[Nessie]

ESTP's are always out and about. They won't hang around and do nothing. They will fix things for you and do projects however. I had the idea that I was just never entertaining enough for the ESTP. He was into sex, renting videos, work, and going out with his friends. I was all for the sex, work, into some of the videos (he only wanted action flicks), and I dreaded his friends...a cacophony of his worst traits in one noisy, drunken place (save me!). (I'm the type who brings a classic novel to sporting events and parties, gets a drink and settles in for the duration.) I do look up to meet someone or when he says to watch the game because the bases are loaded. I wish ESTPs would try to understand INTJs better. INTJs have much to offer: we aren't Feelers at least, we are faithful, we are not spenders, you know where to find us (home or work or in-between...maybe the bookstore), we cook for you and will do your laundry. However we expect you to: do the dishes, all 3D projects, help (alot) with things like vacuuming and general pickup, we need to get motivated and have company for such hideous activities, let us get a maid, let us rent a different video and watch ours beside you as you watch your bloodbath flick, and spare us from your friends...we barely think you are fun, so much less your friends. But we can really like you, love you and be very attracted to you, so give it a try. You will admire our degrees, intellect and wisecracks. Okay, I'm done. Hope this helped.

Spare us from your friends? Im afraid I understand :D

[Nessie]

I am an INTJ and have question for ESTPs regarding compatibility with each other. For some reason me and ESTPs don't get along that well and I can't figure out why. And I am asking if there is anything in particular about an INTJ personality type that rubs an ESTP the wrong way?

I generally get on well with INTJs. But, well, here are some topics:

1. Improvisation
I dont understand much why INTJs gets so anxious and panic or freeze in unexpected situations. At first sight they look quite rational.

2. Speaking rationality: for me rational is to make judgement based on hard facts. Things which are provable, measurable and I dont mind to control myself what I want to know. I dont rely on prejudices, well known "truths" and this kind of stuff, dont use myself as a base for someone elses behavior etc. To say it in other words, I see what I see and not what I expect to see. I have a bit of discussion about that with J people in general, not just INTJs.

3. Order
Im able to make rats nest from my working table when researching or looking for information, which annoys lots of INTJs. But during the proces I dont bother with petty things like that. Ill tidy once work is finished, so I would appreciate more tolerance with that. After all, my working table is mine and I dont try to order someone elses.

4. E vs. I
For me not big deal. INTJs often needs time alone to recharge energy in certain way, I need lots of freedom and authonomy. Its going well together.

And I often like kind of humor INTJs have (usually surprised, because they look serious).
Might more sense for humor and not jumping to judgements and conclusions so fast could repair a bit relations with ESTPs?
And common sense also works with ESTPs, believe me.

[Dylio]

The INTJ I'm currently dating is so great! He is the most considerate guy I've ever dated, and the things he says just truly warms my heart. I let him know that I told my mother I have a boyfriend, and she took it great! After I told him that he texted me saying
"Baby you are so smart, it seems you're always trying to do the right thing, I can tell you from experience that your mom is gonna be completely cool with you eventually. That's so cute you told her."
This is the first guy that I've dated that has a beautiful sense of morality. He isn't selfish and he is highly rational. He treats others exactly how he wants to be treated, and doesn't cut down other people like some of my past disasters. Although we're not really similar MBTI wise, we're very similar to one another in many other ways. I feel so lucky to have such a special person in my life <3

[Adventure]

Ow, a topic I can talk from both sides. =P

As an INTJ

As an ESTP :

Wtf are you one person or two?

[Tawanda]

I get along great with most INTJs, my one good friend is an INTJ and feel like I can talk about anything with her. We have our differences, but one thing we do have in common is that we're not so open with feelings, so somehow we go to each other to talk about deeper things and their meaning.

They all think I'm insane though, as I do of them. :)

[Nessie]

Wtf are you one person or two?

One. Jekyll and Hyde.
Is transpersonality similar to transgender?

I saw as most promoted "shadow" version of ESTP: INTJ, ISTP, one more introverted temperament and 2xESTP (more rigid). Depends on theory.

[Minka]

Married 20 years! It was hard to get him to be faithful initially, but I rationalized him to death. Did NOT marry until he understood!! I am his ultimate nerd, and he is always telling me to improve myself with things like further education (u smart baby, why u settle less) which I always need. He loves to do things around the house of course. MUHAHAHA!~ I like to stay at home all the time when I am not working because I am introvert and he assumes I will help with the house. WHAAAAT! Got him to buy me a bunch of robots for that! He's still a hunk too! Women love him but you try to flirt you are dealing with me I will kill you off pronto (by wit, not an axe! hehheh) He gets all giddy when I get defensive! It's totally fun! And he makes me laugh so hard! When I laugh like a maniac I scare the shit out of everyone and he loves it =) MY BABE <3

[pericles]

Married 20 years! It was hard to get him to be faithful initially, but I rationalized him to death. Did NOT marry until he understood!! I am his ultimate nerd, and he is always telling me to improve myself with things like further education (u smart baby, why u settle less) which I always need. He loves to do things around the house of course. MUHAHAHA!~ I like to stay at home all the time when I am not working because I am introvert and he assumes I will help with the house. WHAAAAT! Got him to buy me a bunch of robots for that! He's still a hunk too! Women love him but you try to flirt you are dealing with me I will kill you off pronto (by wit, not an axe! hehheh) He gets all giddy when I get defensive! It's totally fun! And he makes me laugh so hard! When I laugh like a maniac I scare the shit out of everyone and he loves it =) MY BABE <3

Are you sure you're not an ENFP?

[Minka]

I almost never leave the house. It is why I took all those tests - then I had an epiphany.

I can stay in my house and read more. Forever. Maybe when were are old and grizzly he'll buy me a hut to match the house.

I am not really as smart as I should be. I hated seeing I was an INTJ then seeing all the smart famous people...At work when I revealed I was an INTJ, they laughed, and I mean in a good way. A co-worker said he really could imagine me as a dictator of my own island with a drug cartel and a potato chip factory. (I think I am a mean type of INTJ...sux)

when I was young I was top of my class and when I felt like people were staring at me...being an introvert - I retreated. I developed math anxiety and lost my dreams of excelling in science. I am crying while typing this...but I can and will do better. Money is not everything, and knowledge is the sun to me. It is O.K. I work in a library as a grunt, and volunteer my time away =) I can further my education, and work from home someday... I just am scared to be true to myself!

After realizing I was an INTJ, so many parts of my life made sense. You can question my type, but I can't. Operative word <---over there.

[Minka]

UGH, that last post makes my brain hurt reading it. I kind of feel like I ruined the thread, and I can't delete it. I like to edit more than writing and forums are my bane. I am sounding dumb, but why? Because I have a very hard time explaining our relationship...let me analyze further.
He is very intelligent - has risen high in one job and is studying engineering on the side. I love to watch him WORK. And by work, I don't go to his work and watch him LOL I watch what he does and admire it. He creates beautiful work out of small menial things - because he does them mind-numbingly perfect. He cares for me super lovingly...like an ISFP! We met one of our smartest friends through him - a brilliant INTP that loves him to death. Ah well, sorry to be a part blathering fool in this. The truth is it's very hard work. Good luck =)