[IAmMe2010]

My Entp brother has become increasingly harsh on himself due to his "natural" weaknesses. You know, the general absentmindedness, the kind of thing that makes him lay things down then forget 5 seconds where he put it, lose school papers, forget assignments, and procrastinate till the last possible second. This of course has damaged his grades in school and he has come to frustrating conclusion that he is a helpless idiot. Which anyone who has known my brother(or at least bother to get to know him) would realize is complete rubbish.

As his sister I'm worried about him, I love this guy to death, but he seems to be growing more and more moody as the days go on. I can tell he tries but it's as though school itself is demanding that he be something he is incapable of being and judging him by his ability to conform to this standard. I too went through this and realized early on that I couldn't change things I should just be myself and be happy, my brother on the other hand has taken a completely different turn, he's gotten moody and angry and very self judging. I can't stand this, His normal cheerful joking self is disappearing and I all I want is to get the old guy back.



Any possible help I could get from some mature ENTP's out there would be wonderful, I just want to know what I can do, even if it's nothing but be there for him...

[marzipan01]

Sounds like he's a Si-Fe loop, happens when we're under stress. We lose sight of the bigger picture, get bogged down by details, and get pretty insecure and sensitive. He's got to find where he fits. I say direct him to this:

ENTP.ORG

In particular this paragraph:

"During youth, the ENTP may be diagnosed with a variety of ailments and conditions which often emerge as a lack of intellectual engagement. Boredom is the bane of the junior ENTP. Generally immature until their late 30s or early 40s, the young ENTP is a socially awkward animal since they rarely fit in with the herd, and require 40 years to comprehend why this is and what to do about it."

This should help if he actually is an ENTP.

[aef8234]

hmmmmm....
...
:D

Are you sure you even care about your brother?
It sounds more like you're trying to baby him.

[yesiknowbut]

This was one of the reasons I found MB so useful: the realisation that my dreadful faults were actually counterbalanced by something quite special.

Your brother's problem seems to be his S-J schooling system, to me. I would want to see more attempts at inspiration and intellectual stimulation and less bullying over untidy or missing notes. Nobody should expect people to be what they are not. Trying is...a liminal experience, and that is very painful.

Whateva. I would relax about it. We usually rationalise our way out of this unhappiness in the end. In the meantime if it helps to reassure I actually went through a lot of hearing tests as a kid as always forgot assignments and the teachers thought maybe I was just deaf...had homework returned with "I refuse to mark something this untidy", found myself on stage twice with a poem to read or some script and only at the point where I had to open my mouth and say the thing did I realise that I had no idea what it was I was supposed to be saying, hadn't really thought about it, and had to walk off stage to get help......and I graduated summa cum laude and seem to be making some reasonable success of my life, and I'm happy.....

[Boxter9]

I've been struggling with the same issue for some months now but I'm finally, solidly, on the uptick. Here's why:

- I started using lists. Every day I make a list of the shit I need to get done and then hold myself accountable to see it through to completion.

- I cleaned my room. Having a tidy space is sometimes underrated, but I cannot stress enough the beneficial effect it can have on a scattered brain.

- I started exercising regularly. Not anything super hard - even a walk around the block can be refreshing enough to help me refocus.

- I started watching what I eat. Nutrition = good health = general good mood

- I sleep for several hours every night.

All of these things combined have improved my relationships and my self-esteem. Seeing as you're his sister, I don't know how much power you have to help him adopt these kinds of habits, but... they work. Under these circumstances, the ENTP mind is easily capable of doing twice as much work as a normal person in one day.

[IAmMe2010]

Thanks for the help guys, I really appreciated your answers :3 I read my brother the "ENTP personality profile" on here and showed him your answers. The change that came over him was actually pretty impressive, he seems kinda relieved actually XD Apparently his forgetful and absentminded behavior had led him to believe that he had some kind of long term mental block that would never end, or "some kind of disease that was eating his brain" LOL (Jk ;) )
He looked at me and said something along the lines of "Seriously? So everything that's been wrong with me is just my personality type O.o So then, no pressure right?" or more like he adopted the attitude of, "Don't blame me, I was born this way "troll face" " -_-' (le me)

Anyway, thanks guys, really thanks a lot XD Now I just have to convince my brother that there is a real viable reason to train him self now that there is no chance that a flesh eating amoeba is in his head >.> (he has just told me that he can't stand my little emoticons but I refuse to remove them muhahahahahaha XD XD XD )

[Psyphon]

Thanks for the help guys, I really appreciated your answers :3 I read my brother the "ENTP personality profile" on here and showed him your answers. The change that came over him was actually pretty impressive, he seems kinda relieved actually XD Apparently his forgetful and absentminded behavior had led him to believe that he had some kind of long term mental block that would never end, or "some kind of disease that was eating his brain" LOL (Jk ;) )
He looked at me and said something along the lines of "Seriously? So everything that's been wrong with me is just my personality type O.o So then, no pressure right?" or more like he adopted the attitude of, "Don't blame me, I was born this way "troll face" " -_-' (le me)

Anyway, thanks guys, really thanks a lot XD Now I just have to convince my brother that there is a real viable reason to train him self now that there is no chance that a flesh eating amoeba is in his head >.> (he has just told me that he can't stand my little emoticons but I refuse to remove them muhahahahahaha XD XD XD )

Tell your brother that there is nothing wrong with him. Most of us have gone, or are going through what he's going through. It's a perfectly normal state for an ENTP to be in. Accepting yourself for who you are, and maximizing your strengths as you understand them, while minimizing or enhancing your weaknesses is the key (as with most things in life). @Boxter9 had some good ideas in his earlier post.

If it makes him feel any more normal lemme tell you what's happening at this very second in my ENTP life. I have a paper due tomo when I go into class @ 2pm. I have to work @ 8am though and I'll be taking a 3 hour lunch so I can go to class. Now I haven't even started on the paper yet. I'm planning on doing a few minutes of work for it tonight over the next few hours ... then going to work with almost no sleep .... then using some time while I'm at work to finish the paper ... just in time to go to class and turn it in ... of coarse that entire process will start as soon as I decide that I "feel" like getting off this forum and doing something ... which prolly won't be for at least another half hour (it's almost 1am here BTW)

[aef8234]

Thanks for the help guys, I really appreciated your answers :3 I read my brother the "ENTP personality profile" on here and showed him your answers. The change that came over him was actually pretty impressive, he seems kinda relieved actually XD Apparently his forgetful and absentminded behavior had led him to believe that he had some kind of long term mental block that would never end, or "some kind of disease that was eating his brain" LOL (Jk ;) )
He looked at me and said something along the lines of "Seriously? So everything that's been wrong with me is just my personality type O.o So then, no pressure right?" or more like he adopted the attitude of, "Don't blame me, I was born this way "troll face" " -_-' (le me)

Anyway, thanks guys, really thanks a lot XD Now I just have to convince my brother that there is a real viable reason to train him self now that there is no chance that a flesh eating amoeba is in his head >.> (he has just told me that he can't stand my little emoticons but I refuse to remove them muhahahahahaha XD XD XD )

Yaknow, you weren't supposed to be happy about my reply, you were supposed to go all rawragabalegrgaghbah!
And I was all prove it!
And then you prove it.
Then your brother sees.
Family moment.
And then I ruin it somehow.
But nooooooooo.
You had to thank me. Pfft.

[smoshfan96]

.......................................

[aef8234]

yeah... about that dude. When I make a list I forget the list.

I hate cleaning my room.

I do watch what I eat, go down my throat.

I stay awake at night(sista says it's cuz of smosh...and my diet sucks) well she's right bout smosh. lol

butt I do ride my bike every day.

and also, I'm too young to adopt things, I mean don't I have to be at least 21, you no wut never mind lol.

Really?
I adopted a bunny once.
I ate him.
Kidding (or am I?), you can adopt, just need a parent's permission or something.