So I just came back from an awesome party/get together with my ENTP friend. We have been on and off friends for about 4 going on 5 years but I personally feel as an INFP that we have never been exceptionally close. Through our relationship he has disclosed to me that he feels that we are friends, I personally hold that term to a much higher standard then he does I feel (friends to me are people who constantly keep in contact and who share intimate information with eachother and I don't feel we ever really got past the initial stages of our friendship). That being said during our night out tonight he went threw great pains to express that he greatly cared about my friendship, even reminescing on past events and showcasing our relationship to his other friends he interacts with on a more daily basis. Out of his current crop of friends I am one of only two who have endured consistently threw his college career. I am one of only two who can say they have known him for his entire time at college. Yet I still feel only at arms length from him and don't really feel that close to him, is that a common occurrence with you guys or is he an anomaly?
I think we have had pretty strong ties initially, we both got along well during my early years in college and we have hung out more then a handful of times but whenever I try to contact him or engage with him (mostly threw text) our conversations are static at best. Yet once in the blue moon we interact with eachother and it seems as if no time has passed by in our friendship and connection - we seem like very close friends who have not met with each other in a long time.
He always seems to give me mixed signals, when he is there he is really there. Yet when he isn't it's like he and I don't even exist in the same world together. I guess what I am asking is do I mean anything to him as a friend? He seems to say he loves everyone whenever he is around a lot of people. He loves everyone he is around and talks everyone up but then he doesn't follow threw with those words of true friendship outside of those occasions when I am in front of his face. We don't seem to have too much in common. We both like to drink and we can both drink a ton but that seems to be where most of our interactions come from.
He was there for me when I was in the hospital and he was cracking jokes and made me feel very at ease during my surgery (during an accident that happened during one of our first meets) so I do feel he cares somewhat for me but why is he so cold/dejected/absent at other times? I think I just need to know if this relationship is one that has meaning to him even at some deeper level as we are both approaching graduation soon and I need to know if this is a friendship that means as much to him as it does to me. I know he once told me that he felt I was too involved in trying to be his friend at one point during our early relationship (year 1) which is why he pushed away from me, but since that point it seems that he has been much more receptive to me. He often seems very excited to see me and seeks me out in social situations even when I am speaking to others. I can give more information but I am just hoping to get some feedback from fellow ENTP's at this point. Am I just a toy that he likes to play with sometimes or am I truly a real friend to him that has worth outside of the college playground?