[ENTP] ENTP and INFJ friendships

ENTP and INFJ friendships

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This is a discussion on ENTP and INFJ friendships within the ENTP Forum- The Visionaries forums, part of the NT's Temperament Forum- The Intellects category; I'd like to hear more about the friendship dynamic between the two. I'd also like to know general thoughts you ...

  1. #1
    INFJ - The Protectors

    ENTP and INFJ friendships

    I'd like to hear more about the friendship dynamic between the two. I'd also like to know general thoughts you have about INFJ's. The good, the bad, the honest. Made a few ENTP friends and it's been amazingly beneficial to me as a person. Wondering if it is a two way street?
    vanilla_dream and Tuscan Dreamscape thanked this post.



  2. #2
    ENTP - The Visionaries


    i guess i am the obvious ENTP for the task...

    ranging between fun to freaking awesome, and depending on the level of intimacy and intertwining lives, they can demand a hell of a lot of hard work, because yes there are distinct personality conflicts to avoid.

    i think the hardest part for an INFJ could be trust, because ENTPs are not the most stable people in terms of what they are thinking about. i will be there for others i care for when i am aware that i am needed or what i always need to be thoughtful of, but i am not instinctively aware, i am not actively seeking opportunities to be there for you and no matter how much i try, sometimes your going to get hurt. it takes a long time to get to know when an INFJ is putting on a mask, you with your freakish Ni'Fi loops have no appreciation of how difficult it can be takes other people to get to know each other. so if an ENTP isn't always there for you or does stuff that he didn't really understand how they affect you badly, its not because he's devaluing you, its because the part of the brain telling him when to do those things isn't very loud and our brains can be damn noisy.

    the most difficult part for an ENTP might the INFJ self righteousness. i'll be honest: i find that whenever there's a conflict i always have to be the bigger man. this stems from different intuitive understandings of the word "right" or "wrong". for me, in retrospect i am wrong when i feel like i have wronged someone i care for (a rare few i admit), and have since figured out a way that i could have avoided it. it doesn't matter that "i didn't know at the time", its just that i could have hypothetically avoided wronging them and didn't. there is no excuse for me, only repenting and fixing. while INFJs are... well, you know, you always where right given what you knew at the time, you had your reasons. so this is a huge area of potential conflicts and INFJ doorslams.
    Olmed3011, xEmilyx, Gypsykid and 6 others thanked this post.

  3. #3
    INFJ - The Protectors

    I can see where you are coming from. I feel as though you are talking about an INFJ at their worst most immature level. You described me perfectly in high school, but I feel as though those things have changed as I've been around people with opposing viewpoints (and started listening to them). Also, they may have not developed their thinking side which may make it harder to reason and relate. My father is NT and since I could never relate to my mother's SF I had a better time reasoning along with him. I feed all my feelings through that filter, even though the human emotional connection would be the goal of interactions. Love my dad for that gift of logic. I feel bad for you because I use to be a real self righteous terror to my ex. He left eventually and it changed me. I started listening to people and turned my judgement inward. He changed my life. I only wish I would have done more for him then been a pain. I'm sorry an INFJ hurt you.
    traceur thanked this post.

  4. #4
    ENTP - The Visionaries

    I know of two confirmed INFJs, both male. One of them is my cousin, another a friend. They seem to get a kick out of my antics, but from an audience type perspective. They just look at me with a smile on their face as I ramble on about whatever cynical thing I happen to be thinking about.

    My cousin seems to love my company, I find him likable on average. Sometimes I like having him around, other times I wish he'd leave alone for a bit. He's always so happy, and I usually have a straight face. And if I don't say anything for a few minutes he usually asks me if something's wrong. And he apologizes all the time too. Overall I like him, but he can be a bit annoying with his feeler crap sometimes lol. But I bust his balls about it, and I think he's learning.
    TAHTGUY and vanilla_dream thanked this post.

  5. #5
    ENTP - The Visionaries


    Quote Originally Posted by ValConMoto View Post
    I can see where you are coming from. I feel as though you are talking about an INFJ at their worst most immature level. You described me perfectly in high school, but I feel as though those things have changed as I've been around people with opposing viewpoints (and started listening to them). Also, they may have not developed their thinking side which may make it harder to reason and relate. My father is NT and since I could never relate to my mother's SF I had a better time reasoning along with him. I feed all my feelings through that filter, even though the human emotional connection would be the goal of interactions. Love my dad for that gift of logic. I feel bad for you because I use to be a real self righteous terror to my ex. He left eventually and it changed me. I started listening to people and turned my judgement inward. He changed my life. I only wish I would have done more for him then been a pain. I'm sorry an INFJ hurt you.
    so, your telling me, that you never say/think the words:

    "look what you've made me do!"
    "i was right given what i knew at the time!"
    "i understand the consequences to you but i had my reasons"
    "this is what you understood from what i've done?" *doorslam"

    and... i don't know, intellectually my wife shows an extremely well developed Ti on a persistent basis.

  6. #6
    ENTP - The Visionaries

    I somehow know 6 INFJs (I must have really good karma); 5 males, 1 female. One of those males happens to be my husfriend :3 And if it helps, they're all between 25-31 age range.

    The best way to describe all of them in one word: Philosophical.

    The good: I can talk to any of them about literally anything, and whatever comes out of our mouths will not phase the other, except for maybe dead baby jokes. The female has a child, so that doesn't fly with her anymore; anything else is fair game. They are loyal, honest, fair, insightful, and very good listeners (and even better advice givers). They all have one thing that they collect; aside from that, they are all minimalists. The female collects nail polish, my husfriend collects snugglefluffs, my oldest friend collects hats, another collects vinyl records, etc. This could be from the fact that they all have moved around a lot (as have I.. maybe part of why we get each other so well), so having a bunch of stuff means moving a bunch of stuff which is not a fun or cheap activity. I can also go for weeks, even months, without hearing from any of them, and we can pick up exactly where we left off without any awkwardness.

    The bad: Not morning people. Not a single one of them! Sometimes a bit cynical. INFJs are extremely quick to put their guard up once they get "spooked" a bit by someone or a situation, and sometimes that guard stays up to their innocent bystander friends until they can sort things out. They can also be loyal to a fault, and like their INFP cousins, can become a little too self sacrificing in the quest to make everyone else happy or they may even try to solve everyone elses' problems... which can be at the expense of their feelings, esteem, and sanity.
    Goodewitch, pretty.Odd, bengalcat and 2 others thanked this post.

  7. #7
    INFJ - The Protectors

    Quote Originally Posted by traceur View Post
    so, your telling me, that you never say/think the words:

    "look what you've made me do!"
    "i was right given what i knew at the time!"
    "i understand the consequences to you but i had my reasons"
    "this is what you understood from what i've done?" *doorslam"

    and... i don't know, intellectually my wife shows an extremely well developed Ti on a persistent basis.
    No I tend to blame myself or at least be aware if I've hurt someone.Although, I used to be pretty bitchy to my ex. I would apply my judging function outward instead of inward. Made him miserable. :/


    Quote Originally Posted by Clever Waffle View Post
    INFJs are extremely quick to put their guard up once they get "spooked" a bit by someone or a situation, and sometimes that guard stays up to their innocent bystander friends until they can sort things out. They can also be loyal to a fault, and like their INFP cousins, can become a little too self sacrificing in the quest to make everyone else happy or they may even try to solve everyone elses' problems... which can be at the expense of their feelings, esteem, and sanity.
    Sooooo true! I'm trying to not be so concerned about what others think (it causes the "spooking").
    possiBri, vanilla_dream and traceur thanked this post.

  8. #8
    ENTP - The Visionaries

    I only know one confirmed INFJ. I think I know 2 or 3 more, but I'll stick to the confirmed one. I dont know her exact age, probably early to mid 30's, I am 21 so there is a fairly significant age gape. Im not around her a lot, but I like her and we get along great. If we were the same age I think we would be really good friends. From my experience it seems to be a 2 way street.
    deSouza thanked this post.

  9. #9
    ENTP - The Visionaries


    Quote Originally Posted by ValConMoto View Post
    No I tend to blame myself or at least be aware if I've hurt someone.Although, I used to be pretty bitchy to my ex. I would apply my judging function outward instead of inward. Made him miserable. :/
    you bought me! how did you make this transformation and how do i do it to my INFJ?
    vanilla_dream thanked this post.

  10. #10
    INFJ - The Protectors

    Hold on I wrote something then copied and pasted it and now it is telling me I have to write a post and then I can use "links". So this is my "do what the comp. is telling me response"
    possiBri thanked this post.


 
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