I have known this guy since I was 14, and we are both 21 now. Years ago he became my best friend, and even though he goes to a college a few hours away, we continue to be extremely close. He used to like me on and off during high school, but, I never had romantic feelings for him. He is an amazing person, and on paper I always thought it looked perfect, but I was not attracted to him beyond friendship. I tried to be, but it never came naturally.
A few days ago we hung out with some friends. Everyone else left by midnight, but he and I sat on his beach until amost four in the morning, just us, talking. We hang out a lot by ourselves and have for years (we're the only two of our friends who smoke pot and so we often make excuses to be alone, which means we spend hours upon hours just talking). We were just talking and wading in the water and suddenly it hit me like a brick in the face that I wanted to be with him. Badly. It was so unexpected - for seven years I didn't even flinch, and now I am suddenly so overwhemled by my feelings I can barely sleep.
I am very introverted by nature and I don't enjoy being around many people, but around him I am 100% ENFP, I do not censor a single thought from him, and I can be my complete and total self. It is so freeing just to be with him.
I know this stuff doesn't really go by MB type, but to all of you ENTPs: what would you want the person to do, in this situation? I have never dated anyone, his last girlfriend was almost three years ago. Neither of us are big flirts, when we do flirt it is very innocent and far between. Despite our incredible closeness, it is kind of an unspoken rule that neither of us talk about our love lifes. We just talk about everything else under the sun instead.
About two years ago we were drinking with some friends, and one of them told me "You should make out with ____. It's always been a dream of his." Sounds perfect...but this was awhile ago. I am afraid I waited too long to come around and that his feelings for me might have settled by now. And while I regard him as one of the only close people in my life, he is a people magnet and I know that he has lots of friends at school, so I'm also afraid that I might place more value on the friendship than he does?
These feelings have turned my world upside down, so I'm not really sure what I'm asking. I'm just wondering how badly this could turn out if he doesn't return the feelings. Are ENTPs generally able to move on and look past the awkwardness of big things like this? I can't stand to lose his friendship.
Thanks in advance for anyone who reads or replies. My head feels like it's wrapped in cotton.