[kings]

Im kind of new to the forum so bear with me if im doing this all wrong

So first off i havent been too good with girls and ive never done anything with a girl at all actually. What usually ends up happening is i have a big crush on one girl for a few months then stop. But theres this girl that i have SUCH a fat crush on for at least a year. Ive seriously never felt this way ever. Its so weird haha. I told her a few months ago but she didnt want anything like that with me. But we actually ended up becoming really good friends and stuff.

So recently though i had been kind of flirting with her a lot and she was totally flirting back and i feel like she really liked it. But then i went a little too far and she said we're really good friends but thats it. So im wondering a few things: 1) can girls just flirt but not be into the guy like that? 2) should i keep trying or just stop? 3) if i should stop what, as entp's, is the best way possible to move on? every time i tried to move on i just cant so i need some help. And i felt like the feelings were mutual but she says no but i honestly think shes lying. Thanks in advance!

[chwoey]

Yeah, girls can definitely flirt without feeling anything. Honestly, it would be easiest on you if you just try to move on.

I was interested in a girl for 4 years and she let me hold her hand, cuddle her and kiss her cheeks and she NEVER let the relationship move forward from just friends. It was a lot of pain and definitely not worth it in retrospect. You seem young, so I promise you will find someone else that will like you back.

[MegaTuxRacer]

Yeah I am going to agree with @chwoey. If you can be friends, great. If not don't.

[Mutant Messiah]

So this is the friendzone thread version 2. ;P

[chaos theory]

Some girls are just really flirty. I have some friends like that. Is it possible that you might be misreading the signs? A lot of guys I know are notorious for that.
I get over someone by staying busy and going out with friends. Keep yourself distracted.

[jose cajar]

hi i am not an entp i am infj(17 male). but your title was interesting... any way the from my point of view it seems like you need space away from her and getting over her. (no more flirting) you should think of what is more important to you, do you truly value your friendship or are you friends withe her because you consciously think that you just want to be with her and if that means friendship so be it, and subconsciously you think that there is a chance that this might go further. if you value your friendship getting over her will be a cake walk. but if its the other i do not recommend that you be friends with her because it will be a very long torture for you and getting over her is highly improbable.

[egodeath]

learn to read subconscious body language and subtle signals. never over-analyze what they say or stuff they do consciously, you can fake certain things but there's a lot of subtle signals most girls can't hide. once you're experienced enough, you won't have to second guess if a chick is into you.

also, a lot of females like to do stuff for attention to boost their self esteem so they'll try to get attention from all sorts of guys, just watch out for those ones because they're not worth it. if you put them on a pedestal and treat them like they're a princess all the time and do favors for them, they'll just see you as desperate and that's an unattractive quality in a man. do what you want to do and speak your mind but don't be a complete asshole. tease them with a big ass smirk on your face but don't overdo it, they love that trust me. if a girl does something that pisses you off, express it calmly and don't be a complete douchebag. if she does something good, reward her, don't reward her when she does something that's bullshit.

make sure you make some sort of physical contact or else you're not going anywhere, just dont touch their cooch in the middle of a conversation about the weather (timing is everything). make lots of eye contact and smile, it is VERY important. if you're not good at this just practice. free your eyes more and let them go where they want to naturally so don't be afraid to check them out, just don't stare like a creeper.

don't brag about your job and or how much money you have, only brag in a joking manner where she knows you're kidding. you can talk about yourself but don't be the cocky idiot who thinks he's the second coming of christ. listen to what girls say, they love to talk about themselves. don't give advice like you're trying to fix them, just listen. don't be afraid to show sexual interest, takes some balls and practice but it will help you in the long run. don't hide your own subconcious body language, let your instincts take control, this way they will know you are interested. if you try hiding it, they'll pick up on it anyways because girls are very intuitive.

i know that looks like a big rambling, but i had to summarize a lot of important stuff in a short post. just try to get out of your comfort zone and gain some more experience, everything will come naturally after a while. You're welcome .

[Pavane]

Some girls are just really flirty.

Guilty as charged. But a lot of times that wasn't my intention, some people just take it the wrong way. And even when people flirt with you, sometimes they don't like you they just like hitting on people for fun.

[bellisaurius]

Im kind of new to the forum so bear with me if im doing this all wrong

So first off i havent been too good with girls and ive never done anything with a girl at all actually. What usually ends up happening is i have a big crush on one girl for a few months then stop. But theres this girl that i have SUCH a fat crush on for at least a year. Ive seriously never felt this way ever. Its so weird haha. I told her a few months ago but she didnt want anything like that with me. But we actually ended up becoming really good friends and stuff.

So recently though i had been kind of flirting with her a lot and she was totally flirting back and i feel like she really liked it. But then i went a little too far and she said we're really good friends but thats it. So im wondering a few things: 1) can girls just flirt but not be into the guy like that? 2) should i keep trying or just stop? 3) if i should stop what, as entp's, is the best way possible to move on? every time i tried to move on i just cant so i need some help. And i felt like the feelings were mutual but she says no but i honestly think shes lying. Thanks in advance!

1) Yes, and you can misread it too.
2) Keep at it, but I don't think it's going to achieve what you think it's going to achieve. I think you'll overshoot and look creepy one day (but it'll be loads of fun up till then).
3) You've been friends for long enough that any moves have a decent chance of failure of the sort that'll make things weird. That said, not making a move is going to make you feel miserable for a lot longer. Choose your poison.

Things not to do if you decide to make said move, given the data that you're awkward, and it's been a while since you've become friends:
-Tell her "I love you".
-Try anything corny or cliche to make physical contact (if you're making a move, OK if it's just flirting)
-Become awkward and emotional with whatever you decide to say (you won;t be able to help that part too much, but try practicing what you're gonna do first)
-any kind of joke.
-write a letter- it never comes across like you think it will
-nor will being a secret admirer

I just want to kibosh all the little plots you may plan for this. It's a complicated situation. Nonverbal sincerity is probably your best bet; something like sitting in a quiet room with a very intentful, curious gaze for an extended period. Something that will probably make you feel uncomfortable, but not so far as to be creepy. See if she looks back at you in the same way. If she does, you can probably try something more intimate, like hand holding or putting your arm around her. If it works, kissing may ensue. It's all yours after that.