The darker side to a ENTJ.

openedskittles · 07-21-2009, 01:26 PM

My mom is ESFJ and she'll do crap like call and ask what I'm doing and then when I tell her I'm headed somewhere to meet a group of people and hang out for lunch, she'll be like oh can you stop by the house and work for me for a little bit? I'll ask how long and she'll say an HOUR, which is half the time I even have, so then I'll be like what? That's half the time I have are you serious? and she'll be like I need a lot of help, you can see them later. So I drive over and by the time I get there she's like go away I don't want you to help me, you were rude on the phone. So then I drive back and everyones like wtf where were you?

Also, my mom doesn't think shes a Feeler...

ClubbedWithSpades · 07-21-2009, 11:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by openedskittles

My mom is ESFJ and she'll do crap like call and ask what I'm doing and then when I tell her I'm headed somewhere to meet a group of people and hang out for lunch, she'll be like oh can you stop by the house and work for me for a little bit? I'll ask how long and she'll say an HOUR, which is half the time I even have, so then I'll be like what? That's half the time I have are you serious? and she'll be like I need a lot of help, you can see them later. So I drive over and by the time I get there she's like go away I don't want you to help me, you were rude on the phone. So then I drive back and everyones like wtf where were you?

Also, my mom doesn't think shes a Feeler...

All due respect, she sounds like a nutcase. If my mum did that, I'd make it clear to her that if she's going to waste my time, she may as well seek help elsewhere in the future.

Like, if she's just going to tell you to leave, why not tell you that on the phone, instead of saying "you can see your friends later"? Incredible, srsly.

Flip5 · 07-22-2009, 12:54 AM

If only that S was a T you could talk "sense" into her :D

openedskittles · 07-24-2009, 12:17 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ClubbedWithSpades

All due respect, she sounds like a nutcase. If my mum did that, I'd make it clear to her that if she's going to waste my time, she may as well seek help elsewhere in the future.

Like, if she's just going to tell you to leave, why not tell you that on the phone, instead of saying "you can see your friends later"? Incredible, srsly.

We get in so many arguments. I'm pretty sure she's ESFJ, which does NOT go well with ENTJ.

**Perseus** · 07-24-2009, 02:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Flip5

Here is an example of one way I've handled it, Funny Side of An ENTJ .

Be goal oriented, it allows you to change your modus operandi from purely logical ideals to practical logical thought. So make your goal to be successful at your ultimate goal in that specific situation it will allow you to let go of your standard correctness, but also bare in mind that your ideal is still correct just not in this situation. When you accomplish this goal you've set you will feel you acted logically since you attained your primary goal and you'll feel good inside and won't feel obligated to prove that ideal you wanted to. Also bare in mind that some situations are just doomed to fail and although they should be able to be salvaged if only people or other things changed they simply won't, RUN don't walk from these situations, RUN FAST!

P.S. The Myers-Briggs shadow form is actually this,

Under extreme stress, fatigue or illness, the ENTJ's shadow may appear - a negative form of ISFP. Example characteristics are:

withdrawing and wanting to be alone
having intense emotions, that may or may not be expressed
being very sensitive to criticism
acting very impulsively, doing things to excess

The shadow is part of the unconscious that is often visible to others, onto whom the shadow is projected. The ENTJ may therefore readily see these faults in others without recognizing it in him/her self.

ENTJ Personality Types

Good link. ENTJs are a bloody nuisance. When thwarted they regress to outright bullying. Sabotage is inducing paranoia is the way to counter this. Ask the IT department to put a worm in his computer.

ClubbedWithSpades · 07-24-2009, 09:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by openedskittles

We get in so many arguments. I'm pretty sure she's ESFJ, which does NOT go well with ENTJ.

So is my Dad. And our relationship is well-described by your statement. =/ [Much as I love him.]

Vector1369 · 08-04-2009, 10:08 PM

As ENTJs, our shadow and our Anima are two sides of the same coin. Our anima, or animus for the ladies, is the ISFP.

When people are difficult, the best strategy I have found is to try to embrace the anima side of my personality and see if it does not do a better job of relating to the person in question.

Some caveats:

Under heavy stress, our Shadow emerges (sort of an evil ISFP) and we can become impulsive, withdrawn or vengeful. When I find myself going there, its time for a vacation. Nothing comstructive can happen with the Shadow in charge.

Under moderate stress, we revert to type. We might get a bit dictatorial and fail to make the effort to even recognise the feelings our more sensitive companions may exhibit. That sounds to me like the problem the DayLight is struggling with. The anima is a big help, here.

Daylight, if possible, slow down and use your dominant and powerful Thinking ability to analyse the other's motives and come up with a game plan. If they insist on pressing, plan A should be to remove oneself from the situation. Plan B might just ignore the pest until you can act constructively. If they continue to press after that, they brought this on themselves... just let 'er rip. Hopefully, they won't do it again.

I hope it helps.

Flip5 · 08-04-2009, 10:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Vector1369

As ENTJs, our shadow and our Anima are two sides of the same coin. Our anima, or animus for the ladies, is the ISFP.

When people are difficult, the best strategy I have found is to try to embrace the anima side of my personality and see if it does not do a better job of relating to the person in question.

Some caveats:

Under heavy stress, our Shadow emerges (sort of an evil ISFP) and we can become impulsive, withdrawn or vengeful. When I find myself going there, its time for a vacation. Nothing comstructive can happen with the Shadow in charge.

Under moderate stress, we revert to type. We might get a bit dictatorial and fail to make the effort to even recognise the feelings our more sensitive companions may exhibit. That sounds to me like the problem the DayLight is struggling with. The anima is a big help, here.

Daylight, if possible, slow down and use your dominant and powerful Thinking ability to analyse the other's motives and come up with a game plan. If they insist on pressing, plan A should be to remove oneself from the situation. Plan B might just ignore the pest until you can act constructively. If they continue to press after that, they brought this on themselves... just let 'er rip. Hopefully, they won't do it again.

I hope it helps.

Nice post

"Sort of an evil ISFP", indeed it's dark and gloom and highly insidious. Many will do a complete 180 from critically analyzing peoples thoughts to taking everyone's words (on a thinking level) for face value, causing a lot of problems and resentment in others.

ClubbedWithSpades · 08-04-2009, 10:52 PM

I enjoy my inner-ISFP.

She likes to sit in the woods and catch butterflies on her fingers. Just like me.

I give her a lot of exercise.

Vector1369 · 08-04-2009, 11:15 PM

Butterflies, you say?

Now I'm curious. One of my favorite ways to indulge my inner ISFP is through solitary interaction with nature and its beauty. My vacations are usually some type of nature adventure. That, or they involve animals, like birds. My last girlfriend said that she thought I was cold and uncaring until she saw me with my pet parrot.

How common is nature as a theme for ENTJ relaxation?? Anyone else?