| || |
This is a discussion on What pisses you off about ENTJs? within the ENTJ Forum - The Executives forums, part of the NT's Temperament Forum- The Intellects category; Originally Posted by Grim The test is easy to score N over S on. There's lots of mistyped folks. Perhaps ...
They give totally open-ended answers to ANYTHING that I ask. Often. Very difficult to extract useful information.
I am in a relationship with one. Honestly, what I dislike about it is this:
I can't grow as fast because he wants to do/ oversee all the work.
It's a bit stifling.
He is too rigid and unbending.... there is no point in arguing or discussing your side because it's impossible for him to see it. Reminds me of an ISTJ in this way. Too close-minded.
He is so judgmental and always thinks he is right.
He's a hypocrite, and it's impossible for him to see this. If you fu** up, you're useless, but if he fu**s up in the same way, it's ok.
I have had my space invaded before, and if he thinks it's the thing to do, it's ok. He doesn't respect some of your boundaries sometimes, when he is angry or wants to prove a point. If you push your side, he might leave, or break down a door if you lock yourself in a room. He sets boundaries when you even try to push your pov on him, which he is willing to do to you constantly.
He's one controlling bastage sometimes. He will do what it takes to manage and maintain control, short of hitting someone.
He doesn't intimidate me in the least - maybe it's my personality type. He seems to me to be a big, stubborn, unbending, critical, name-calling teddy bear to me. (It may also be because I dealt with sociopaths for years - and an entj or any other type is a walk in the park comparitively. I was grateful to meet this guy lol). He doesn't bother me like he would some other types. Boy, can he run his mouth and argue, and will for hours on end if he takes the notion. He tends to blame everything on you, no matter what. In order to remain with him, you must learn your side well, and argue it well, and you must know what you want and push for it. You have to be one strong mother fu****. LOL. I've found that it works if you use their own techniques on them (for example, he calls people wusses all the time, so when he tries to say I am "abusing" him, which is honestly just hilarious, I will tell him he's being a wuss, which is what he would say about someone else). He will try to manage you by what is important to you, so if he can't find anything, it's more difficult. He could be manipulated by believing you were interested in something you aren't. He's very manipulative himself, and will say what it takes to manage you.
The things people could exploit:
Since he does all the work, if someone were lazy, it would be the perfect scenario, as long as you could put up with him.
He is a good provider, and believes that is his duty to provide for me. I can see where that could be taken advantage of.
Yea, he gets stuff done at work. I think he is a "nicer" person there. At home, he can be a real pri**. He keeps getting more and more obese, but if I say anything about it, he calls me abusive. LMFAO! I have no idea why he is guarding his weight. I guess people get what they deserve in the end. He will probably die of a heart attack due to obesity, because he doesn't care to listen or do anything about it.
You can win arguments, but you have to be quick, knowledgable, strong-willed, and persistent. They will back down/agree with you/change after you win the argument, but they will never admit it.... ever. It becomes noticable after awhile. They use strategies against you, and sometimes they are hard to beat, but it's totally possible, and the more you know one, the more you can get what you want from them. I have thought about trying to change him, but I am not so sure at the end of the day that it's a good idea. What if it changes his job performance? Not so sure I am down with that, for him.
I do care very much for him, I've learned a lot from this relationship, and he is my best friend. So I don't want anyone to think I am just dissing him only! But yes, he is difficult, and it takes a special kind of person to deal with him.
Last edited by ISTPangel; 03-12-2010 at 12:35 AM.
I've read that ENTJ's are actually one of the more open-minded types.
Personally, I thoughtfully consider all ideas, but there is definitely such thing as a bad idea and I will let you know why I think an idea is bad. Conflict to clear the air is best described as enjoyable, and I'm doing someone a service by showing them how they are wrong. I mean, who would want to be wrong anyway?
The only thing that pisses me off about ENTJ's is that there are not enough of them! I've only met two and they were a couple of my best friends in high school, but it seems very difficult to meet more.
My brother is an ENTJ and theres nothing he loves more than a good argument, which if its against me, he always wins. But because I'm an ISFP and I dont like conflict and I'm not very good at expressing myself verbally, I usually tend to give into arguments pretty quickly which I think annoys him because he likes the challenge of proving that hes right about everything but because I tend to stop argueing, he doesnt get much of a chance to prove his point. Sometimes he'll just keep argueing even though I've stopped, which is pretty annoying.
Their also very bossy and controlling. When I was younger, my brother always acted like he was my dad by telling me what I should be eating, how I should behave etc.
They can be very infuriating sometimes but if you've lived with them long enough, you learn how to deal with them.