[Le Beau Coeur]

Just wondering how you feel about people who complain most of the time? I know some people who do this and I'm not quite sure how to handle it.

[autumnglori]

To be honest, talking to people who only complain just drains me. I mean, it's understandable when someone complains every once in a while, but there's something wrong once it starts to happen everyday. I'm more than happy to listen to people and give advice to them most of the time though. It's just that when they get too negative, I start to feel like I'm being sucked into a black hole with them. ||OTL At this point, all I can do is try to get them to smile or laugh. Distracting them with the random things I come up with usually does the trick.

[chimeric]

Consciously, I feel an urge to be understanding and sympathetic. When a person needs help, I want to be supportive.

Subconsciously, being around people like that does really crappy things to my own mental state. Strangely, it took a while before I even noticed that correlation.

[MuChApArAdOx]

I tell them to shut the fuck up, seriously i do. I can't stand people who are constantly complaining, having pity parties, oh poor me. Just shut it already, i don't want to be part of your negative depressing world ;) If something isn't working , change it. If you can't be bothered to do so, they STOP complaining .

[Ace Face]

There's venting which I'm fine with, and then there's bitching which makes me want to slap people.

[Nafatali]

If it’s genuine, then I’m happy to lend a listening ear and offer help where I can.
If it’s complaining just for the sake of it then I’m more inclined to switch off.

[pinkrasputin]

I'm a "live in the solutions" type of person. If a person complains, I may offer solutions. But if I discover this is all they do and just get stuck on complaining, I carve them out. I can't stand to hear complainers.

I have a friend with generalized anxiety disorder. She does have a reason why she sometimes gets stuck, but even then I have to establish clear boundaries so I don't get stuck in her loop. It's very draining and it's usually a matter of meds for her.

I guess the reason I can't relate to just shear complainers is because if I bring up a problem, I am just searching for a solution and will try anything and everything to make something work. I like staying in the positive. What the hell does complaining do except distort your perspective and waste time?

Lol! I'm complaining about complainers.

[NaughyChimp]

If it's someone with a real issue, I have all the patience in the world. Eg. If someone has cancer and is constantly ill from the chemo and complains to me about it after each chemo session, I'll be supportive and empathetic.

However, if someone is just a constant complainer, I feel positively insulted and disrespected by it. I have plenty of negative things in my life, too, but I make a concerted effort to put on a happy face and not burden others with them, much; why can't they have the decency to do the same!?! Do they care so little about my state of mind that they feel it's okay to vomit their vitriol all over me?

[La Petite Sirène]

My default mode is to listen and try to help (like most of you have already said). But, like the rest of you, I also get really irritated when it's obvious that the person doesn't want solutions, and just likes to complain to anyone who will listen to them. I also get very short with people who continually bring up the same thing. "You already know what I think about this issue, so let's drop it" is my usual response.

I can't hate on complainers too much. I've been known to complain a fair bit too. But the only difference is that I complain and then I do something about it. :)

[SocioApathetic]

Like this: