However, even though we have been a short time together our reality with an impending deployment didn't really allow for a lengthy honeymoon phase. We had to "get real" really quick. My guy better know I love him- he knows I was willing to wait one year for him while he was in Kuwait. And in preparation, we both read books together like "Divided By Duty, United In Love", etc. He knows what I would have sacrificed for him, because I found so much gain in being with him. At the very least, my guy knows I'm 100% committed and I trust him completely. I know he is the same because we've spoken about it and show it to each other in our actions everyday. Our type of relationship takes of TON of trust and fortunately we have that. I need to mention that military relationships, especially army ones, are not for the faint of heart AT ALL. But neither is dating an actress.
Although, I have a second love language=verbal communication, my guy sort of sucks at it. Lol. But what he expresses to me physically, is the most incredible poetry I've ever experienced and it has brought me to tears on a few occasions. He has busted open my soul. He has said things like "Babe, I will accept you no matter what you look like." And after ironing out a conflict he usually reassures me "Babe, we're working on it. These things just take time. We are getting there." Oh yeah, and whenever I present him with a need or present him with a complaint, he has this cute response which is "I'm tracking." Which means: I understand, I'm listening, and I will make sure to adjust my behavior. Haha. He is so robot military ST.
And I finally realized his second love language=gifts. He came over and brought my daughter and I the most amazing gifts for Christmas. I honestly don't think I've ever met a man that could give so appropriately. (With the exception of my daddy ) But really, my ISTP just knocks one out of the ballpark with what he gives. He's a very generous man and my daughter and I are both so touched. In my house, we are surrounded by his gifts. What he gives in gifts is very personal. And he really downplays the actually giving of the gift-he is very humble about it. He also cooks for me a TON.
The other way my guy shows love, is that he always forgives me and shows me he is always willing to change if I request a need. My guy doesn't request much, but he also knows I have forgiven him. Forgiveness is huge with us. If we didn't have a ton of it, we wouldn't have made it a week.
Physical expression, gifts, commitment, the willingness to learn (he likes that I study everything military and go on forums), forgiveness, and a butt load of patience are just a few of the ways we show love/commitment to each other. Our quality time is also precious, but due distance and the freaking military throwing my guy everywhere, that can be a very hard thing to fight for on both of our parts.
I also think we are both very good at encouraging and supporting each other's individual pursuits. My guy knows I'm 100% percent behind him in all that he does because I tell I am all the time. We both text or say "I miss you" to each other often. (And that is usually harder for me to express to someone than "I love you", btw.)
Oh yeah, and my ISTP will text and call me, and not because he likes doing it. He does it only because he knows I need him to. Do you know how freaking RARE phone calling and texting is for an ISTP? Lol. If that doesn't say LOVE, I don't know what does. Hahaha. Poor guy.