Hi fellow ENFP'ers, I need your help!
Okay, so I was never the popular kid at school. I had a few close friends but I don't think I was ever in the popular crowd. However I kept on telling myself that things would get better and fortunately, they did. Once I entered high school, my circle of friends seemed to have grown by quite a bit. I was really happy, until my stupid over analyzing, sensitive side started to kick in. It was partially due to weight issues which led to my plummeting self esteem and me finding an excuse to leave every time my friends would go out for lunch/dinner. Don't get me wrong, I was/am not anorexic or bulimic, I just didn't want to eat food that seemed particularly unhealthy and send me rocketing back into my overweight days. But that's another story xD
Anyway, I have this issue where I get disappointed because I probably have too high expectations of others. I guess I just want them to do what I would do for them like stay with me when I feel sick and not ditch me, notice when I feel sad, etc etc.(sorry for sounding so selfish!) but things like that don't always happen and when they don't, I feel somewhat disappointed and let down. Which is really annoying because I know I should just appreciate what I have. And then when I see my friends do that to others (like help them when they feel sick, etc) I can't help but feel sad at the fact that they didn't do that for me. So I lapse into this mode of over analyzation where everything is filled with negativity and it's not a nice place to be, filled with thoughts like what did I do? why is she mad at me? Am I too boring? etc and I really want to change that because I feel like I'm starting to alienate myself from all of my friends by being this selfish person who craves company and well, attention (ironic because I'm really shy) and sometimes I find myself struggling to keep a conversation going with other people.
I really appreciate it if you've read up to here - you don't know what it means to me because I haven't really told anyone about this yet since I don't really open up about my feelings that easily because I'm scared about what others think about me.
So ENFP er's, how do I become more sociable and less over analytical over these small, trifle matters and focus on the more important and optimistic things in life?
Thanks so much and please don't judge!