[muppetgirl]

I so rarely find a man who can keep my interest for more than 5 minutes..when I finally do...

The flood gates open, I don't hold back, I cannot temper my excitement or intrigue. I am afraid this will be the death of my dating life. I think I am too intense, too open. I don't play games and lately I am thinking maybe I should????

I do not date much because true connections for m arer so rare. I am not into looks (besides the obvious baseline attraction), money does not impress me...I am just hungry for that one little connection, the getting of each other and ensuing never ending desire to connect, discuss and relate. I refuse to waste my time or his if I'm not feeling it. I hate leading guys on. So when something special comes along....well lets just say...it's on...

I know I am rambling, but can anyone else relate? Thanks

[muppetgirl]

I also wanted to add.....one of my guy friends (INTJ) told me that the right guy will want and need my intensity. Do you agree with that notion? Thanks again.

[Danse Macabre]

Yessum! I always prod and poke guys I am really attracted to with questions, and I absolutely open up and let my personality expand and fill the room. Because if they like what they'll see, then we'll quickly be in a deep relationship. And if they son't, well I won't have to waste my time waiting around wondering "What if!? Does he like me!? He doesn't know me! Argh!"

[energeticelephant]

I think I come on too strong whether or not I'm attracted to someone or not Yeah, it can get me in trouble. I just can't seem to help it sometimes.

If I'm truly attracted to someone, though (like willing to make that special and pretty rare "connection") I'm Ms. Intensity-ville. When I get it into my heart that I like someone, all I want to do is explore who they are. I want to know every corner of their mind and soul and I want instant gratification. It's been a true test over the years to just hold off and be patient. It's the same intensity, just not all at once.

Again, though, the right guy is the guy who appreciates my intensity. I firmly believe that.

[muppetgirl]

I think I come on too strong whether or not I'm attracted to someone or not Yeah, it can get me in trouble. I just can't seem to help it sometimes.

If I'm truly attracted to someone, though (like willing to make that special and pretty rare "connection") I'm Ms. Intensity-ville. When I get it into my heart that I like someone, all I want to do is explore who they are. I want to know every corner of their mind and soul and I want instant gratification. It's been a true test over the years to just hold off and be patient. It's the same intensity, just not all at once.

Again, though, the right guy is the guy who appreciates my intensity. I firmly believe that.

This is me...I think I have been accused o fgiving too many tests, surveys and quizzes...LOL

So, do you think this type of behavior would totally freak out an INTJ??

[energeticelephant]

This is me...I think I have been accused o fgiving too many tests, surveys and quizzes...LOL

So, do you think this type of behavior would totally freak out an INTJ??

Nah...definitely not. They're some of the only guys who have not only appreciated, but matched my intensity.

INTJ intensity + ENFP intensity = intensity mushroom cloud.

[MissyMaroon]

Oh god, do I relate. It's not even just romantic relationships. Just overall, I'm always afraid I come off too strong. I mean I've learned to hold back a lot and be casual. But, when (with a friend or lover) I feel the person means a lot to me, I'll want to express it and say it in ways most wouldn't dare saying lol. I mean, throughout the years, I've learned to be more mild about this, but it is my natural inclination. I can be very intense and it shows. Sigh. But not many people like that. They either think it's gushy or creepy. Sigh, indeed.

[perennialurker]

Speaking from my own limited perspective, I find such intensity to be quite appealing and necessary. I have no idea what about it appeals to me (it just does), but I believe it is necessary because I do not pick up easily on the subtle social games and hints that girls usually like to play around with. In retrospect I have found that I turned down advances from people that I didn't even know were interested.I fully agree that such directness is also the most efficient way of gauging interest as well.

[perennialurker]

I also think it worth noting the high representation of Enneagram type 2s who are responding in the affirmative to this thread.

[tine]

Yeah definitely, with all relationships. I'm always hungry for a connection with people. My sister said she can see me trying to connect with everyone and I get frustrated when I can't (usually because me and the other person are too different or they don't have enough depth). I also get told to talk more about myself and ask fewer questions when I meet people for the first few times