are ENFPs simply irresponsible?

**Tridentus** · 05-30-2010 09:07 AM

most responsibilities stress me. being tied to any expectations,etc. stress me. in an ideal world i would just go around being friends with everyone and only having to care about social things and my interests which would bring out the very best in me. obviously this isn't how the world works, and i have a theory that this actually stops us from reaching our full potential as ENFPs, some like the character ferris bueller say screw it and disregard responsibility and as a result, it frees him somehow and everything is achievable, they're bulletproof. obviously that's a movie, but i think it rings true of ENFPs in real life. we're delicate, but the potential we have is ridiculous, it's just that more often than not we're not going to be able to reach it because that's how the world works, and responsibility is one of the key factors.

what do you think? are we simply, coldly, unashamedly, empowered by irresponsibility?

**The Dreamer** · 05-30-2010 09:21 AM

i think this is very true but i would say this keeps Us from reaching our true potential which is very high but it makes it extremely hard for us to get there so a lot of us never reach it cus of that

**firedell** · 05-30-2010 09:44 AM

I think it's mostly FP's.

**Wheelie** · 05-30-2010 09:56 AM

Yeah I worked my way up an organization by making friends pretty much. I make friends both up and down, but when it comes to the technical stuff I can say there are many who are more suited to my position then I am. Yet some how I'm still here. I've always seemed to fix my irresponsibility with smiles and talking.

I agree that we are irresponsible, However that irresponsibility isn't actually irresponsibility because we can't really surrender our responsibilities in life, only our control. THink about it!

**MissyMaroon** · 05-30-2010 10:24 AM

Eh, it depends. I think we ENFPs are pretty responsible when it's something we actually commit to. With things I don't actually believe in, I can push those aside, but for everything else I put in at least the minimal effort to sustain it.

**Rube** · 05-30-2010 10:35 AM

Originally Posted by MissyMaroon

Eh, it depends. I think we ENFPs are pretty responsible when it's something we actually commit to. With things I don't actually believe in, I can push those aside, but for everything else I put in at least the minimal effort to sustain it.

I'm like this. If I'm involved in something I care deeply about, I'll do whatever it takes to be as successful in it as possible. Problem is this RARELY happens. And many things that other people think are necessary for survival (getting that promotion, flawless grades, following social norms, etc.) I think are bullshit. So naturally I don't put much effort into them. So it could be that our desire to be genuine keeps us from caring about many things other people feel are important, since we feel caring for these things makes us "fake" in some way. As a result, we come off as terribly irresponsible.

**Linnifae** · 05-30-2010 11:41 AM

Obligations stress me out. Plans stress me out. I hate being tied down by anything...unless it's something I'm passionate about. I'll do anything for my friends and family but things like school....I did well when it was something I was interested in, but if it wasn't, I simply didn't care and therefore couldn't do it.

I'm responsible at work though beacause I actually don't mind my job for the most part and it pays the bills

**Iggy Hazard** · 05-30-2010 12:10 PM

More like Simply Irresistible.

YouTube - Robert Palmer - Simply Irresistible

**Aiam** · 05-30-2010 11:06 PM

heh--Iggy's comment aside, I don't think we're irresponsible. I tihnk irresponsibility requires a lack of empathy for those who suffer for us not following through.

I think it's our mecuriality that dooms us. It takes supreme effort on my part to bring anything to closure. And that's what responsibility is, delivering on a promise: completing a task. In a way, we're hardwired against it.

So I play games in my own mind; I alleviate the sense of closure by making sure I understand I can move on to something new when this ends, and that it's not a final ending, just the wind-down of a chapter.

If we're talking about something onerous like repetitive data entry, then it's pure discipline that gets me through. I think of the sense of accomplishment that follows if I meet a deadline or complete a task, but more importantly, I let that empathy rock on through and imagine what it would feel like to be the people let down if I don't come through.

Irresponsible is such a harsh word; it implies willful neglect from the person it labels. I think many misunderstand ENFP "flakiness" to be a disregard for others, and that, as we well know, isn't true at all. We just have issues with persistence.