[Mercer]

im asking all types, what do you think of us ISTJ's? I just find in some places we harbour bad reputations.

[ENXJ]

That's just a shame...no one responded =(.

Let's see...how do I perceive ISTJ's...first, know that I don't intend offense with anything I'm going to say in the post.

I perceive ISTJ's to be too fixed about the way things should be done - not open enough to new possibilities. Also, in ISTJ parents, I tend to see them as overly-disciplinarian. At the same time though, their "roboticness" fascinates me - I think "wow, their motivations must be so radically different from mine that we live on different worlds." Unfortunately, I've had little in-person experience with them =/.

[Lilsnowy]

OK, as ENXJ said, PLEASE TAKE NO OFFENSE BY THIS POST: This is coming from an extrovert intuitive!

I was an ENFJ years ago partly due to my relationships with both a friend who was an ISTJ and a close relative who was an ISTJ. I couldn't really be myself and live in peace with either of them. But now I'm true to myself as an ENFP and don't worry about pleasing people so much.

I found ISTJs are always 'on,' projecting a friendly energetic persona in public, but the opposite in private. Both were very vindictive and withholding in private. Whiny when they didn't get their way and they had to win at all costs, even if it meant they lost the esteem of people who worked for them or lived with them. Had to be in control and saw people not as friends but more like extensions to accomplish their whims. As a boss, this works to some degree, but in any other relationship it really doesn't.

Strengths would be that ISTJs are very decisive, professional and efficient, with a great deal of confidence that they can accomplish whatever they want to. I really respect their strengths because they are so diffferent from my own.

ISTJs can be: Bossy. Controlling. Conditional. Fussy when under stress. A big one for saying, "Because I said so." so no further communication is possible.

It may be that the two I knew were not emotionally healthy but I don't know. I found their public persona to be much different than what they were like in private.

Repeat: PLEASE TAKE NO OFFENSE BY THIS POST: This is coming from an extrovert intuitive!

[OneInChrist]

I am an ENFJ and I am married to an ISTJ. I absolutely adore him and appreciate his dependability. But we definitely butt heads because he is so set about following the rules. Thankfully he is open minded with me and is totally committed to our marriage, as I am. He is a wonderful father to our 10 month old daughter. Dependable, loving and gentle.
We are best friends, but honestly, for the most part I would not be friends with someone who is and ISTJ generally. I am an EXTREME Extorvert. So, now being a SAHM with and ISTJ husband has been very isolating and we are currently working on some solutions for that.

As and ENFJ though, without being sensitive to who my husband is, it is easy for me to become impatient and just think he is a jerk, also that he doesn't care about other people (outside of our little family) and I get very frustrated with how easily his feelings are hurt.

That is my take on ISTJ's from a VERY inside perspective lol. And with that, I just want to share, that being aware of our personality types, at least for me thus far, really helps me to be sensitive to who he is and why he behaves the way he does.

I think it is good for ISTJ's to step outside of themselves and try to understand how others perceive them (as you are doing) because, I think it can really help with better relationships and communication. But you are getting that from someone who thrives on relationship! lol

I hope that helps you a little!

[jdmn]

Hello!! My mother is an ISTJ (T or F, a little bit undecided) and from I can tell, she's a wonderful mother. She is very direct and honest, altough sometimes she may hide her true thoughts about things with acquitances or other kinds of people. A total introvert but not a shy person, if a situation requires socializing, she doesn't hesitate. Has a good judgement of things, and she is supportive and caring, but if she has to disagree with you, she can't fake it.

My mom really hates disorder, so she wants the house clean, luckily we have a housemaid (a god's gift XD). She's also a very dedicated, loyal and responsible person, who always strive the best, altough she gets tired and stressed easily. The bad thing about my mom is that she has a short temper and may get depressed easily, for many reasons. I communicate a lot with her and she understands me and I too. She's one of the well developed ISTJ.

[mutton]

My step-father is an ISTJ. Lilsnowy's post- as unflattering as it seems- has been my experience with him. Now, don't get me wrong, I do love him, but he is a bit hard for me to handle in large doses. I feel I should mention that he probably isn't the most healthy example of one due to a very rough life that seems to have messed with his world view quite a bit. He is controlling to the point of micro-managing. As mentioned in a previous post he seems real friendly and alomst perfect in public, but in private he can be cold and quite distant. He is always right, and everybody better realize it. He very much wants people who have done wrong (even if only in his eyes) to be punished. Perhaps not ISTJs are this way, but he is the only one I know well.

For the good: while he isn't exceptionally intelligent, what he knows he knows well; probably better than anyone else. He will also make an extreme effort to understand what he doesn't.

All in all, going of my only varified sample of one individual, I can say they aren't horrible, but I still prefer to keep my distance. I like the intellectual stimulation, but wouldn't want to live with one again.

[steelbutterfly]

ISTJ's make a great mentor to ENFJ's. my mentor is an ISTJ. I have gotten SO mad at her sometimes because she unwittingly hurt my feelings so many times. I know she didn't mean anything by it, but she honestly tries as hard as she can to communicate with me, who is so different from her. she brings out the "J" in me for sure and helps me to stand up for myself, be more assertive, and not let people push over my boundaries. I tend to be a pushover because sometimes i think it "helps" people not be upset and maintains harmony (which is usually short lived in this case).
I love her dearly. She is my sister-in-law and is a person that is willing to do the right thing when nobody else is doing it and everyone disagrees with her. She is the reason my husband's whole family is getting free from severe abuse and PTSD. A pioneer would be a good word for her. She sees things in me that nobody else does and i appreciate this so much.
This relationship came with time. we butted heads for so long while i submitted myself to her and her husband (ENFP), knowing they really did know best. We (hubby and I) stuck with them through everything, and now we are reaping the benifits of an amazing synergy.

I will note, however, that if an ISTJ is not willing to submit themselves to leadership and take correction from someone, they cannot be a good leader. (think of a strong-willed child) This is true for everyone, but ISTJ's tend to leave a trail of destruction when proper boundaries go by the way-side and have the ability to hurt people (NF's in particular) very deeply. My sister in law is mostly the good leader to me because she makes herself accept correction, and she filters her mouth when criticizing. This is a learned skill and completely necessary to maintain relationships. If you are an ISTJ, please remember this.

[Kalifornia310]

ISTJ's Scare me, only cuz they are so blunt sometimes.. messes with my Harmony. but I love my ISTJ friends. One of them is like my BFF, shes like my lil sis. shes super dependable and responsible. but if you ever cross them watch out....

[kph5034]

My dad's an ISTJ... he's an alien to me.

[AnneENFJ]

ISTJ's bug me. A lot.

That said, in every job I've ever had, I've ended up being close friends with a peer that is an ISTJ.

I've learned a lot from ISTJs -- I've learned what I want to emulate, and I've learned behaviors I want to make sure I never exhibit!

The things I don't like about ISTJs:

• whiny
• anxious
• black-and-white thinking
• unaccepting, judgmental

The things I like about ISTJs:

• they hold me accountable for backing up my pronouncements with data
• unwavering values (even if I don't agree with them, I admire that they stick to them)
• they are fun to gossip with because they see things differently than I do (I'm not proud of this one, but it's true)