[Peanut Brittle]

Hi. My friend is an ENFJ and she is also the child of a really messy divorce. She is being forced to live with her mom who terrifies her so much that she had to sleep at a friend's house last night. What should I say to her to give her strength? Better yet, what could I say that would give you strength?

[Benedox]

Honestly, sometimes it's not about what you say. I really prefer when a friend is just there for me. Give her a hug, rub her back a little, look at her and let her know that you care. Hold her hand and say something like, "Hey, I'm here with you through thick and thin." When I'm going through a hard time, it's not advice that gets me through, but feelings. When I feel loved, I can get through anything. So yeah, let her feel that love. I wish you and your friend the best of luck.

[kiwigrl]

The best way is for me to explain what people are like with me at the moment, since my dad died recently.

I have been getting texts from friends just to say that they are thinking of me and praying for me. Since I have an aversion to phones right now, it takes the pressure off me to talk at length but I know that they do care. This is good.

Some friends are proactive with taking me out to try and cheer me up, which is nicer than empty promises but I have to feel like being around people on that day. Be proactive, don't say things like "Let me know if there's anything I can do to help" because ENFJ will never want to burden you with requests.

[Silvem]

Just be together with her and listen to what she has to say. Probably nothing you say can make anything better. If you are there for her, I am sure she'd be grateful for your support. Try to make her think less about the problems she has and bring out positive emotions, which could suppress the negative ones. Sometimes hanging out with more than a few friends help me. The best remedy for me is a private sit. To talk to someone I trust the most. Sometimes when I stay at my best friends place, we talk for hours before we go to sleep. The fact that I have someone to trust and that someone trusts me is giving me enough strenght to get me through every day.