[ENFJ] ENFP (girl) and ENFJ (guy) relationship

ENFP (girl) and ENFJ (guy) relationship

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This is a discussion on ENFP (girl) and ENFJ (guy) relationship within the ENFJ Articles forums, part of the ENFJ Forum - The Givers category; I'm an ENFP and I am really interested in a friend who is an ENFJ. I love how he loves ...

  1. #1

    ENFP (girl) and ENFJ (guy) relationship

    I'm an ENFP and I am really interested in a friend who is an ENFJ. I love how he loves people, I love that he is organised, I love that he is decisive, I love his humour, and I love his confidence. Obviously, we have very similar goals and morals too (concrete material to work with, not just infatuation). I'm usually indecisive and it take a lot of effort for me to be organised, so I really appreciate his guidance. Despite me being disorganised, I love being organised and always strive to be. These two factors were brought up in a previous thread on this forum with a negative slant. What's your opinion? Could this combo work?

    I am also a huge fan of communication, showing love, and receiving love.

    I realise ENFJ are quite loveable to everyone, so who knows if he feels the same about me. I'll just keep working on being the best friend I possibly can, while keeping it real, and who knows what could happen.

    We are both adults and we both are looking for a serious relationship when the time is right.

    (Sorry, this is the second time Ive posted this. I think I posted in the wrong area before so I'm trying to delete it)

  2. #2
    ENFJ - The Givers

    Um... so you're asking whether it's okay or not whether your ENFJ would be turned off by your well... messy-ness.

    Well, I guess unless it's ridiculously bad, you shouldn't have anything to worry about. I'm a middle of the road kinda guy when it comes to having my things neatly organized. I have a table where I keep my stuff and there are some things lying about places that don't make it look too neat but there's nothing overly messy about my room.

    I'm a big fan of ENFPs and I do believe in ENFP-ENFJ relationships. I know an ENFJ who's had a rough relationship with an ENFP before but outside of that, I believe it could work rather well.

  3. #3

    Thank you so much kc. I really appreciate your time and thoughts . I read someone that enfps don't like being controlled and felt suffocated by enfjs, but I h appreciate it, so since those two issues aren't really issues I wonder what else could be.

  4. #4
    Unknown Personality

    I really don't think type is much of an issue. One thing about this forum I've noticed is that people place far too much stock in personality types when it comes to romantic relationships. I can't see why any healthy, well-developed and basically decent person of any type couldn't be happy together. I mean, a lot of detail about types is basic idiosyncrasies; which once you become familiar with, it's dandy. If you don't like them, it's because there is some core divide between the two of you which prevents a romantic relationship from ever working; it's not because of the implications of some 4-letter code.

    In other words; go for it. If it's going to work, it's because of you two as people and the actions that you make. Don't regret anything :)
    splint3r and qualuapua thanked this post.

  5. #5
    ENFP - The Inspirers

    I am an ENFP...and I am personally attracted to ENFJ's the most...for exactly the same reasons you are..also i love being around people and new places too much to be with someone who doesn't (most introverts). For the past several months I have been becoming best friends with this male ENFJ....and accidentally fell in love with him. I thought he felt the same way about me for several months..but like you said...he is very loveable toward everyone. Moral of the story..he didn't feel the same way back. So...be careful.

    And my advice is...be honest with him. Get everything out on the table...cuz the longer you wait to know how he feels...the more the rejection will hurt. Ultimately, "Not knowing is worse than knowing the worst."....at least for ENFP I'm guessing.

    but you probably weren't asking for advice about that partiularly...but in my coping state, i word barfed on you. But YES enfp's and enfj's i think would be the PERFECT match.
    qualuapua thanked this post.

  6. #6
    ENFP - The Inspirers

    I'm an ENFP who has (briefly) dated an ENFJ in the past and is currently dating one again (but to be fair this one's J preference ranks in at only 1%). The first ENFJ I dated drove me CRAZY - his externally-focused value system did not mesh well with my Fi. It felt like he was always trying to "fix" me to politely conform to the values of society, which is NOT a goal of the ENFP in any way.
    The ENFJ I'm dating now is a lot more accepting/supportive of my ENFP zaniness and we haven't hit any major issues yet :) Though I've always found it tiring when ENFJs try to dig into my emotions right away - most ENFPs have an almost nonexistent Fe function - Fi takes longer to open up!!
    ENFJ/ENFP can be a very satisfying connection - great conversation and focused on many of the same issues. Not the perfect match by any means but definitely do-able between two well-developed types who are committed to making it work.
    qualuapua thanked this post.


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