A lot of male problems are mired in misogyny, in fact, so feminism will talk about those.
--from Jessica Valenti, Heís a Stud, Sheís a Slut, and 49 Other Double Standards Every Woman Should Know."You see, it was understandable for me to want to be a tomboy and do ďboyĒ thingsóbecause men are better, after all. But for a guy to want to be feminine? Unthinkable. Now, while this double standard affects men negatively, itís mired in misogynyóthe idea, of course, is that thereís nothing worse than being a girl. Think about it. Girls can wear pants; boys canít wear skirts. Girls can play with trucks, but the minute I caught one of my little boy cousins playing with a doll, he threw it across the room with a look of shame on his face. Itís demeaning to be female, and boys learn that from an early age."
Thing though, although feminism is about equal rights, it is also about recognising where they are not equal, and about helping in a way such as to create equality. Which, in the case of inequality, means helping unequally - based on need, in order to create equality. A man may be limited in how he can act because if he acts according to any part of his character that is seen as 'feminine' then he will be stigmatised. But women - who and what they are, or are seen to be, is seen as awful and as a way to insult and shame others. To be insulted and shamed is shitty - to have your identity used as a label of shame points to the real power dynamic - and is also really shitty.
The untangling of misogynistic power dynamics and bullshit gender roles is part of feminism and both men and women can benefit from that.
Like rape culture. It blames women for being raped, being sexual, for being seen as sexual, for, you know, being raped. It puts women in charge of men's sexuality. It's a way to oppress and abuse women. It also paints men as unable to control their urges, buys will be boys, yada, which although not oppressive, is still discriminatory.
That sort of worldview is also part of the 'men can't be raped - they want it - it is feminine and weak to be raped - it makes you a pussy' victim-blaming that attached to male rape victims."The thing is, itís patriarchy that says men are stupid and monolithic and unchanging and incapable. Itís patriarchy that says men have animalistic instincts and just canít stop themselves from harassing and assaulting. Itís patriarchy that says men can only be attracted by certain qualities, can only have particular kinds of responses, can only experience the world in narrow ways. Feminism holds that men are capable of more Ė are more than that."