I've always thought the concept of connecting may lead/refer to any form of verbal or non-verbal understanding. This made me feel like an active, equal human being, as if I'm a participant of this "rat race" as well.
But lately, it seems 'connecting' is all about an emotional bond. And that's where I get clueless, trying to analyze my relationships with people - realizing I am not close to people most of the time... Realizing I do not even trust most people... Realizing I can become quite distant and detached in an almost destructive way (detachedness may go hand in hand with fear/distrust/contempt/etc.)
While on the other hand, I am capable of 'sensing people's essence'... :O
Which feels like a sort of -human connection- too (as in, _a_ connection between two humans -- something, an understanding perhaps, coming together)! Yet I, personally, remain untouched.
So I've been wondering whether this is a possible type thing or just a human thing in general, because it somewhat troubles my self image.
It seems I am perfectly capable of analyzing interactional patterns and how things work about and come and go but I have a harder time feeling my way through it without being an observer.
I feel very joyful when I can finally "connect" to someone as many people say. I relate this to intimacy. It is rare. It feels real - to me. It's not an illusion and this amazes me.
[I mostly only realize my emotional connection to a person once there's an ending and beginning of some sorts. Otherwise, I seem ignorant/oblivious/personally distant in some way or another.]
I wonder about this word and its connotations, meanings, and so forth.
What is connecting to you?