Male Expectations vs. Female Expectations

What gender do you believe to be persecuted more in terms of expectations of behavior and following stereotypes?

I'm not sure if one has it worse than the other - just that they have very different expectations.

Female expectations: be bubbly/giggly/emotional, love get-togethers/shopping/other social endeavors, think concretely instead of abstractly, be organized, have good housekeeping skills and interior decorating sense/interest

Male expectations: be adventurous/aggressive/bold while suppressing emotions, love competitive and risk-taking endeavors, think abstractly instead of concretely, be messy, have good mechanical/spatial skills and interest in activities utilizing them (engineering, etc.)

my favs that always make me laugh

male=knight in shining armor
female=damsel in distress

i know some people like to assume these roles but geez don't expect all of us males to be that way (and vice versa)

I always hear people say "be a man!" or "a real man does this". I even catch myself saying things like that sometimes. I never hear someone say "be a woman!" or "a real woman would do that". For this reason, I would have to say that men get persecuted far more then women for not conforming to preconceived standards. That being said, the same example I have given also demonstrates the fact that women are more disrespected then men. The expectation for a man succeed at meeting a certain standard often implies an expectation for a woman to fail at meeting that standard. "You throw like a girl" is a good example. It insults the man for not meeting a standard and disrespects the woman by implying that the standard for a woman is that of the failing man. So, in summation, men are more persecuted and women are disrespected due to our culture's way of thinking. I'm hardpressed to find a way of thinking more broken.

Originally Posted by marked174

I always hear people say "be a man!" or "a real man does this". I even catch myself saying things like that sometimes. I never hear someone say "be a woman!" or "a real woman would do that".

That's true. However, there is a definite awkwardness females like me experience for having so many stereotypically masculine interests, and I think your example of the sports saying of "throwing like a girl" helps illustrate that point to an extent. While some men like athletic women who can share interests like video games and such (my fiance is one of these), there are also many who find it very unattractive. So, while they won't go as far to say "real women would shop and not like sports," the majority won't find it sexy at all. Women, however, rarely will view men as very unattractive just because some may have more stereotypically feminine interests. I've never heard a woman say, "Oh, you like ballads? That really is a turn-off!" A woman who likes sports, though? "Yuck, how butch!" is a very possible reply.

Originally Posted by kdm1984

That's true. However, there is a definite awkwardness females like me experience for having so many stereotypically masculine interests, and I think your example of the sports saying of "throwing like a girl" helps illustrate that point to an extent. While some men like athletic women who can share interests like video games and such (my fiance is one of these), there are also many who find it very unattractive. So, while they won't go as far to say "real women would shop and not like sports," the majority won't find it sexy at all. Women, however, rarely will view men as very unattractive just because some may have more stereotypically feminine interests. I've never heard a woman say, "Oh, you like ballads? That really is a turn-off!" A woman who likes sports, though? "Yuck, how butch!" is a very possible reply.

I won't deny that sometimes these characteristics are veiwed as unattractive to some people, but most people do not feel this may. Most people, do however, condemn effeminate behaviour in men. Men will definitely take more heat from the ballads then women would from the sports.

Originally Posted by marked174

I won't deny that sometimes these characteristics are veiwed as unattractive to some people, but most people do not feel this may. Most people, do however, condemn effeminate behaviour in men. Men will definitely take more heat from the ballads then women would from the sports.

good observation

The sexes are pretty much both persecuted by societal expectations in different ways - men are often "policed" by other men to make sure that they don't do anything that is seen as either unmanly or feminine. Women are often "policed" by society to not be too promiscuous (but not too prudish either), to be more considerate of others, to be more willing to take care of others and to be more selfless. It's important that all men and women do their best to counter this persecution and be who they want to be, not who society dictates that they should be because of their biology. It's not illegal for a man to be anything other than ultra-masculine, and it's not illegal for a woman to be anything other than ultra-feminine.

Neither, the struggle and resentment to break away from traditional stereotypes affects both equally as much. You cannot have one without the other.

Originally Posted by OmarFW

my favs that always make me laugh

male=knight in shining armor
female=damsel in distress

i know some people like to assume these roles but geez don't expect all of us males to be that way (and vice versa)

OMG, I hate when men try to play knight in shining armor with me.