Sensors and abstract thinking - Indifference and participation in conversations

I posted this in the ISTJ forum already, but I'd really like some outside perspective as well. It's specifically aimed towards sensors, hence the questions are worded as they are.

I found that I'm quickly shutting out of conversations if they don't concern me or hold any particular interest in my mind. I often think "This is insignificant" or "This has no meaning whatsoever" - even on things that may actually be significant to some people. In some discussions, my opinion on a subject is so clear that I don't care to discuss it, followed by the thought "Why are we even discussing this when a billion people have done so already?" I'm practically minded, and if something has no practical implication, it's troublesome to show interest.

This is something I'd like to overcome, because I come off as either careless or boring in such situations. I know there are great benefits to reap by forcing myself to engage in something I find insignificant at the moment, as it might prove to become valuable in the future. Besides, there's only a limited range of conversations that can be held on a purely practical perspective, and I think I'll be missing out on a lot if I lock my mind to my own preference.



Here are some questions to ponder:
* Can you relate to what I'm saying?
* Do you find it necessary to engage in conversations that you don't care for and if so, what's your motivation?
* How possible is it for a strong sensor to develop his abstract thinking capabilities and by what means?

At least you're not like one of my ISTJ friends in High School. He didn't even like Fantasy Movies because he thought they were frivolous and "not real enough". LOL. But that's obviously a bit extreme to be related to type. My other ISTJ friend was a huge anime fan.

Maybe you could try to "find the practical thread in it"? Or how the concept could possibly (though that word sounds a little Ne) be applied practically. Anyway, I can find common ground with my ISTJ Dad by discussing things that are both practical and conceptual, like politics.

Originally Posted by Flipit

I posted this in the ISTJ forum already, but I'd really like some outside perspective as well. It's specifically aimed towards sensors, hence the questions are worded as they are.

I found that I'm quickly shutting out of conversations if they don't concern me or hold any particular interest in my mind. I often think "This is insignificant" or "This has no meaning whatsoever" - even on things that may actually be significant to some people. In some discussions, my opinion on a subject is so clear that I don't care to discuss it, followed by the thought "Why are we even discussing this when a billion people have done so already?" I'm practically minded, and if something has no practical implication, it's troublesome to show interest.

It is often a case of "this is not significant NOW". However, it does not mean that it won't be significant when you find yourself going through the same experience. How will you behave and react then? Will you remember what you have said and heard before?

This is something I'd like to overcome, because I come off as either careless or boring in such situations. I know there are great benefits to reap by forcing myself to engage in something I find insignificant at the moment, as it might prove to become valuable in the future. Besides, there's only a limited range of conversations that can be held on a purely practical perspective, and I think I'll be missing out on a lot if I lock my mind to my own preference.

Here are some questions to ponder:
* Can you relate to what I'm saying?
* Do you find it necessary to engage in conversations that you don't care for and if so, what's your motivation?
* How possible is it for a strong sensor to develop his abstract thinking capabilities and by what means?

Depending on the situation, sensors can come off as uncaring. It is not a bad thing under practical situations, with no human emotions involved. But it is seen as a weakness as such under a situation whereby human relationships and emotions are involved. You reap what you sow? Never reap something if you don't believe in it. Only do something because you start to believe it. Cos how you do something can be detected and sensed by the other party.

- I can absolutely relate to what you are saying, cos I am an NF. I read intuitions, from how you use your written tone and words used. I can find within me a "feeling template" of what you are expressing. This comes to me very easily.

- I used to engage in ALL types of conversations that I did not know that I don't care for. I thought that partaking socially means that I am learning about myself, as well as learning about others. I have however since I'm older now, I reduce the number of social interactions, cos I cannot hold so many emotions, and details from such interactions within myself any more. Doing so dilutes your focus sometimes. I used to partake in conversation in case I can "help" somebody. i.e. by listening, and by encouraging, and by reassuringly etc. I am an NF, this is my nature. My motivation you can say is trying to be "me"? Doing this makes me feel better somehow, and that is the truth of my nature. If I feel I am not needed in some way, then I feel so depressed.
(By the way, I am also partaking in this thread is because I sense that you need help to view it from a different point. Cos I know you cannot quantify something outside within your own mindset. Hence, my motivation here is to help you see the other viewpoint. NFP are also lateral thinkers too. We see gazillion of options and possibilities even when given with limited info to work with. )

- Since sensors are do-ers. I think you should write down, or draw big maps, of how you want your life to be. I don't think you can think abstractly in an ad hoc way. However, you can absorb what other people are saying, and write down what you think is useful. So that you add these pieces of info like jig saws into the map each time. Eventually, you will see a big picture with lots of possibilities, and then you know what downfalls to avoid.

e.g. My brother wanted to send my nephew to a private school. So he went and asked my auntie who did just that about it. He remembered this, and wrote down the advantages and disadvantages, and the potential pitfalls.

He already possibly has very simple ideas of his goals in life. i.e. Send child to school. Raise Child. But, having my auntie giving him ideas and approach, he can bypass any potential issues along the way and have a smoother journey. So, he now knows the expected costs. He now needs to know what he has to earn to keep him in that school. He now knows the style of teaching, and how best he needs to supplement the child's studies in any other way. He can re-evaluate where best to spend money with regards to his education, and where not. He then plan his life, whether to upgrade house or move. Or whether business needs to hit a certain target and how etc.


One thing I really dislike about my brother is that, he comes across as "using people". I mean, he only asks my auntie for help, because he knows that is where he can get help. However, many people don't think that. They are givers, and not just users... If you don't give, and help others, then why should anyone give you anything in return? It's karma, you know? I am also fairly certain that, if my mother's generation did not help my auntie and uncle, then she would not pay the respect back to this generation. So my brother should indeed be grateful. Cos it is human relationships, and care. If my auntie did not care, then she would not have gone way out of her way to help him, and to help him pave his child's way.

If you ever have feeling for somebody, then DO that action. Cos doing the action cos you felt something is more genuinely than just asking, and not returning the favour in a clinical way. I think that is the sensor's downfalls...

I can very much relate to what you're saying ... I tend to fall out of discussions as soon there's nothing engaging for me in it and I tried a lot of stuff. For example, I want to put myself through watching the news and being able to talk about current events with others, but I'm so not interested in anything so far away from me etc. So my friends suggested me this: try finding a challenge in it for you. So, if "learning something new" isn't a challenge for you, than make it a challenge to "manage to stare in the TV screen for the whole time the news are on". By doing this, as an additional bonus, I'll definitely remember at least one of the news.
But I tried it and it works if you're willing. So challenge yourself to - for example - at least discuss why you find a topic insignificant, if you already don't want to talk about it. Etc.

Originally Posted by Flipit

I found that I'm quickly shutting out of conversations if they don't concern me or hold any particular interest in my mind. I often think "This is insignificant" or "This has no meaning whatsoever" - even on things that may actually be significant to some people. In some discussions, my opinion on a subject is so clear that I don't care to discuss it, followed by the thought "Why are we even discussing this when a billion people have done so already?" I'm practically minded, and if something has no practical implication, it's troublesome to show interest.

This is something I'd like to overcome, because I come off as either careless or boring in such situations.

I believe what you are describing here is not a sensor issue but rather an introvert problem. All introverted functions seek to adjust environment to yourself, rather than adjust yourself to environment. Thus you shut down when your environment doesn't offer that which you say is meaningful to you - or in other words that which doesn't resonate with your inner world defined by your introverted functions. The higher your introversion - the less frequently you will develop an interest in what's around you. Thus even though I am a dominant intuitive I can relate to your issue as well also being an introvert.

How to increase extraversion I am not sure. I do know that whenever I try to be more spontaneous in conversation that my inferior function Se does come into play. Same is true of my ISFJ mother only for her it is Ne. So perhaps developing your Ne will help.

Thanks for every reply so far.

It seems to me that I need some time to read up on each function more thoroughly. I shall respond with something more well thought out in (hopefully) not too long.

Probably is a Sensor thing, because I like to analyze things for credibility when they don't even apply to me.