how i came out of the darkness..
by, 07-20-2010 at 01:22 PM (320 Views)
i've mentioned itmore thn once around the forum that i used to be depressed. the story of why isn't worthing telling: heart break, same begining and same end as any story about that. so yeah peak of it all was when i relaized i'd never have her,i cried for day until i was so numb to the hurt. thats how i describe the feeling like things were so bad you become almost numb to them and that worst as you want to feel as it let's you know you're stil alive. so yeah i was stuckin thinking it was all my fault,and of ocurse it partly was, and i jsut spent alot of time thinkig"why why did this happen who did this to me.." and that was my problem i was looking to find an explaination for it all and there wasn't one. i rememeber it hit me so bluntly that there was no reason behind anything, that things happen on their own accord and hat no motivation is needed to live, and so i learnned how not to look for blame. the next problem was i had developed a very negative viewf myself, it seemed like i couldn't find anything about me i liked. now many people say you have"to get postive and find the good"but this isn't how i dealt with it. i basically developed a ver neutrel attitude of myself i became in my mind"alright" and this was better than the negativity, but it was a bit of a stepping stone, gonig form negative to positvie in one step would've been to much, then i decided for myself how to measure myself and deicded for myself what kind of people i liked and i proceedto make myself that, above all i wanted to honest and kind the things that people had not given me and once i made myself into that i started to like myself and i found the people around me were the same. looking back i never felt like i changed myself i just twisted all my views to make things work.so yeah thats how i over came depression, if it helps someone great, but i know there are no easy solutions..