rappf

Semi-consciously, semi-subconsciously, I have a tendency to neutralize any absolutes and/or connotations in my speech and expositional writings. I suppose, to an extent, this is a effective way of operating in some environments. (SEE, OMG—That was involuntarily absolute-neutralizing. "To an extent"? "In some environments"? Wow.)

Somewhere along the line, though, this "situational-bias-reduction," uh, transmogrified into "having-my-own-opinion-is-equated-to-death by-guillotine-or-the-cleanup-of-vomit." It was an adaptation kind of thing at the time, because the latter statement was, in sentiment, relatively true. ("Stuck in an environment that can't adapt to your psychological needs? Try out Losing Your Opinion™ today! The results are dazzling; not only will you become unobtrusive, inside and out—yes, sweep away all that cognitive dissonance—you'll also become a machine! Losing Your Opinion™—if they can't adapt, you can! Call 1-800-SMITE-THE-SHRINK-NOW.")

Yeah... So, uh—this here. This is going to be me exercising subjective opinion and some pigeon-holing generalizations, because I suck at them, and humans generally need them to stay sane. Because no, this is not the Human Instrumentality Project—"BIAS MAKES LIFE COLORFUL, EVEN IF VIOLENT, TOO~!<3"—and if that ain't a quasi-platitude or what.

I've determined that the vehicle of my practice in gross, unfair generalizations is going to be MBTI. I mean, it's just asking for it, with all those categories to be inappropriately summed up and made into absolutes. The Temperaments, the dichotomies, the functions, and the Types—oh the Types.

Because I can't completely let go of the whole "neutral playing field" thing, I'm attempting (read: attempting) to make equally bigoted, generalized statements to the exclusion of no groups whatsoever. Like South Park. Equal opportunistic affront? Yes.

So, here I go. I'm gonna give everything a black-and-white moniker for my health!

TEMPERAMENTS

NF: "Dreamy-Person"
NT: "Life-Form"
SJ: "Resident-Ritual"
SP: "The Handsy One"

DICHOTOMIES

Attitude (I/E): "Misanthropic Hermit"/"Over-Involved Bigmouth"
In Consideration (S/N): "Myopic Simpleton"/"Neurotic, Absentminded Weirdo"
In Conduct (T/F): "Cold Bastard"/"Saccharine Softy"
Lifestyle (P/J): "Spineless Underachiever"/"Inflexible Bitch"

FUNCTIONS

Preference Ordering:

Dominant: "Insufferably"
Auxiliary: "Inevitably"
Tertiary: "Mildly"
Inferior: "Fails At Being"

Decisions:

Ti: "Information-Dependent"
Te: "Direction-Dependent"
Fi: "Impression-Dependent"
Fe: "Relationship-Dependent"

Info-Gathering:

Si: "History-Dependent"
Se: "Practice-Dependent"
Ni: "Hunch-Dependent"
Ne: "Situation-Dependent"

TYPE(S)

That being said, I am a(n):

INTP

Temperament: Life-Form

Attitude: Misanthropic Hermit
In Consideration: Neurotic, Absentminded Weirdo
In Conduct: Cold Bastard
Lifestyle: Spineless Underachiever

Insufferably Information-Dependent
Inevitably Situation-Dependent
Mildly History-Dependent
Fails At Being Relationship-Dependent

There you go. An absolutist battery of insult. Have fun—find out how you have been pigeon-holed. And then feel mildly-to-largely misrepresented/offended. Whee.