Thoughts and Musings

As a note, I'm not Foamy, nor do I have his particular disdain for everything. I don't swear with almost every breath I take, and I'm actually far more calm than him in reality. Very few things get under my skin. That said, he makes a lot of good points. In this 'quotes' entry, I selected my favorite sayings that bring up these good points.

Foamy the Squirrel
(warning: he uses a lot of profanity)

"My only piece of advice to have a sound relationship is to leave each other alone. Don't be overly concerned. Don't try to domineer them. Let them be independent. Let them do what they want. You think you people can understand that? But yeah, there are some reasons to be suspicious like if your girlfriend walks into the room with a condom on her head then you know you may want to ask a few questions, but other than that, try to trust the other individual." - Dating Advice

"How about this.... Stop with the fucking reality shows. I am so sick of this fucking bullshit with the fucking fake-ass marriages for money, the munchkin bachelor shit, and anything that has to do with greedy motherfuckers who will degrade themselves for cash." - Foamy's Rant III

"For all the dieting you people do, for all the makeovers and all that other crap that you people do to make yourselves all attractive, you're all gonna go old, you're all gonna get wrinkles, and you will all eventually die." - Foamy's Rant IV

"I'm sick and tired of people warping simple topics into something perverted. And God forbid if you're a woman who gets caught up in some kind of twisted wordplay like this. Before you know it, everyone at school or work is getting on your back because you made a comment about a large ball. It's unnecessary, it's stupid, and it just shows that you're thinking with your sexual organs rather than your brain." - Foamy's Rant V

"So if you're a drunken moron or an idiot who has to manipulate legitimate conversations to get a cheap thrill for your libido, please feel free to get together with one another on the weekends, drive around drunk, make all the twisted sexual comments you like. And I'll just watch from the local diner window as they scrape your body off the pavement with a fucking spatula." - Foamy's Rant V

"I'm sick and tired of people saying, "Well, it relieves stress." You people are the worst. 1. You're weak-willed. 2. You're fucking pathetic. {mocking} "Oh, I had a stressful day, so I gotta have some pot." {forms joint with fingers} Give me a fucking break, okay? You people just can't deal with reality, and that's your fucking problem. I don't give two shits about, "Oh, I had a stressful day." Big fucking deal, the rest of the world had a stressful day, alright? It's called life, deal with it." - Drugs in Your Head

"It makes you sound like a poorly schooled moron... Seriously, this is all simple shit. Try to polish up the language a bit and remove some of the moronic thoughts brought out by a limited vocabulary." - Words and Phrases

"I mean, seriously. I personally don't give a flying fuck if some dumb-ass celebrity is (mocking) getting married or if they have an eating disorder. (normal) To me, this is not news." - Celebrities

"I went through my whole life making damn sure I didn't smoke. And now, because some ass-clown didn't have the willpower to say (mock) no, (normal) and got hooked 12 years ago, I'm supposed to take their moody bullshit? Fuck [that]." - Smokin' Smokers

"Now, there are 2 types of quitters: those who say "You know what, I quit" and actually quit and never pick up another cigarette again. I like these people. They are strong-willed people who deserve a big piece of cake or sugary item of their choice." - Smokin' Smokers

"Oh yeah, there needs to be some quality control with the whole punk thing. It seems like anyone with a tattoo and more makeup than their mothers call themselves punk these days. Punk is a state of mind, not a fashion accessory." - Germaine, A Plotless Conversation

"I'm not buying into that double standard. Either everyone can make fun of everybody or no one can make fun of anyone." - Comedians

"Every time I watch the television, all I see are idiotic people who are more attractive than your average person act like complete assholes. Convoluted stories, rehashed scenarios, dumb game shows, stupid cartoons, liberal brainwashing media, and some talking head dictating to me what I should wear because it's in fashion for the next 6 minutes." - T.V.

"Seriously though, turn off the TV and do without it for like a week or a month, and you'll see your personality change. You'll be happier, worry less, and eliminate 90% of negative information being sent to your brain. Good deal, yo." - T.V.

"And as for these musclebound idiots, if they get all in your face about the [mocking tone] "importance of sports" [normal] just tell them sports are about as insignificant as their jobs and that there are more meaningful things in this world than tossing a ball back and forth like a bunch of retarded 2-year olds." - Gym Teachers

"And in closing, you know its shit like this that pisses me off, it’s just these types of people that have no inner soul, no nothing; they just revolve around their own pathetic little world with no consideration for what’s going on around them. They have no sense or grasp of reality and really need to be taken off the face of this earth, they have no substance, and they have no control over themselves." - Foamy's Rant

"Sometimes holding a door open for a lady is just done for the sake of being kind. It's not meant to imply that you're weak or feeble, it's just a courtesy, nothing more." - Door Holding & Baby Brigadiers

"If I'm literally right behind you, hold open the fucking door! Don't let it slam in my face!" - Door Holding & Baby Brigadiers

"So, now that we've established that politicians underfund public schools to keep people dumb, what about those special folks who have the means to go to a private school? Surely they have a better shot at earning an education. true, but not to worry big business and your local sponsor will bombard them with all sorts of high tech gadgets gizmos online life sucking monthly fee riddle games that they will all put on their credit cards so they can keep you perpetually in debt and perpetually working to pay off that game of Warcraft you played online in 2003." - Political Shifty

"Ladies, I know the whole make-up thing is there to make you look all attractive. But seriously, the whole facade has to come down one day. And guys and other women will see you as you really are. Wouldn't it be better to just be yourself all the time rather than hide your flaws under powder and lipstick? ... Just be yourself all the time and people will know what to expect." - A Woman's Deceit

"If people are causing all the problems, then logic would dictate, we need less people. So, if you're an [fanatical] environmentalist and you don't kill yourself, you're just being selfish. You can't go green if you're breathing." - Go Green

"Every year around the holiday, some jackoff has to go complaining to some court about how he hates Christmas and how there's some manger scene with Baby Jesus offending him at some local school ... Well, who cares ... If someone decided to toss a baby Jesus on the front lawn during the holiday ... what's the fucking problem?" - No Christmas For You

"Folks who hate Christmas scream "tolerance for all!", but intolerate difference when it's right at their door. They bitch and complain about Christmas in town, while Menorrahs and Kwannzas are on the school grounds. It's a known double standard, both simple and true," - Letter to Santa