Women Pursuing Men
by, 08-19-2011 at 02:19 PM (385 Views)
This was taken from my journal on August 14, 2011. I started a thread in the INFP forum asking all the men where they were, and was inspired to write this journal after the subject of flirting had been approached and was beginning to frustrate me. It sounded a tad preachy to post on the forum. I didn't want to post it on my facebook in case someone read it whom I'd eventually ask out. That would be too awkward for all parties involved. Clarifications: My first name is Brianne. It sounds like Brian except whinier :P The quote from 1 Corinthians is the beginning of 1 Corinthians 4, "Love is patient. Love is kind. It does not envy. It does not boast. It is not proud."
"Logically, I believe that waiting for men to ask you out is ridiculous. How are you supposed to find the perfect guy if you can only choose from the people who ask? Most of my female friends whom I ask this question, if they’re honest, can admit that they like gender roles because they themselves are afraid of asking boys out. I can’t blame them. It scares me, too. I’ve never asked out a man before for the same reason I wouldn’t wait for a man to ask me out. What is a person pursuing when one starts dating? Is one pursuing another person or a relationship? If you want someone to snuggle with and take in anyone who fits under the crook of your arm, that person can run away from you at any time. If you want to snuggle with someone, you two can comfortably arrange yourselves to fit together no matter how your elbows work if you love one another enough to try. Personally, I would rather remain single most of my life and have three, two, or maybe even only one relationship with someone whom, if he breaks my heart, will be worth all the pain. Is it idiotic to want someone to snuggle with? Absolutely not! I want one <3 But 1 Corinthians whatever-whatever--(Here is the moment we remember that I am an INFP English major and not an INTP Math one)--begins with “Love is snuggly.” Oh wait, actually, it begins, “Love is patient.”
In conclusion, when I joke about not getting married till I’m fifty, I’m not being self-conscious at all! XD Brianne is a very pretty girl <3 I know how easily my own heart is taken advantage of because of my trouble with boundaries. I really, really want to love everybody xD Thus, I’ve decided to embrace my natural intensity.
Further Notes: In my small group this week at church, we discussed 1 Corinthians 13:1-8. These may be my favorite verses in the Bible although apparently I don't know where they are. I feel like I cheated when I quoted it in this journal entry because in my New King James Bible replaces the word "love" with "charity." I like charity better. I read The Idiot by Fyodor Dovstoyevsky with my dad (INTJ) recently and the moral of the story basically is Passion<Compassion<Power. If you ignore the Power part, Passion<Compassion. 1 Corinthians 13 isn't talking about passionate love; it's talking about compassionate love. If you like, however, a nice blogger here made a compact list about chastity, but the points they make largely are not about chastity. Chastity is a detail. They're making points about FOCUS. Focus on God, not on sex, drink, and money. If you are not a Christian, none of this will really matter to you. Another time I will write a personal essay about God, but in this particular argument, God's existence is a detail, and I am making a point about FOCUS.
When you focus on whom you want and not whom you might possibly want, you are more likely to settle with whom you want and not whom you might possibly want.
I think that's quite enough for one day. :)