Kytaari's Self-Discovery Journal

Everything seems so surreal to me. I'm not used to feeling this way. I'm so focused on the consequences of my actions now, and I feel like the stuff I do actually matters. It's kind of unnerving, and I'm not used to this feeling of responsibility. I feel like chains-of-events have been processing for a very long time by now, and they're about to build up into something. Will I be ready for it?

I'm not used to feeling like my actions are that important. I'm not used to thinking that I have an effect on other people's lives. I still don't know what other people think of me and how they feel about me. Am I succeeding or am I failing? Why did this weight drop on me so suddenly? Why am I so focused on consequences more than ever before? Is this feeling only gonna get worse? What if I can't succeed these expectations?