The Same Table in Art

I rant. I wrote this earlier, once as a shoddy poem, once as a huge ongoing rant. I'll simplify it.
I'm an idiot with people.
I have a weird fear of girls.
I'm afraid of people.
I can never figure out the right way to behaive or the right things to say.
I like climbing trees.
I think I just convinced a girl in Art that I like her even though that was the opposite of what I was trying to achieve. So she doesn't like bis or gays, that's okay. I'm cool with that. It's when I try to be cool about it that I stuff up. Five minutes of trying to be as un-bi as possible, I ended up looking like I was hitting on her which is something she would probably believe.

When I'm not annoying my friends, not meeting expectations of people older than me, I'm stumbling trying to figure out what to say to a person I actually like. Me hitting on someone? It's like this:
Me looking at books. I love books. I would marry books.
"I hate books," he says.
"So do I! Uh, well I mean... I like books, err... I don't read much well I do but I don't get much done you know uh reading."

I don't care about iphones ipods phones whatevers but I wanted to talk to this guy.
"Oh hi. This is stupid huh? Collecting Miss's tree..."
"I got a new phone"
"Oh... cool..."
"I dropped my old one in a puddle"
"Haha..."
"this one tells the weather and stuff."
"Cool."

"Hey, how's it going?"
"Good. I got a new puppy."
"Oh awesome, I have cats"
"Uh... yeah."
Yes, I have cats. I also had a fear of dogs until, well I still don't like them.

Here's the best part: I like guyA. People think I like guyB. That girl is not my type. She thinks I'm hitting on her. My fear of people doesn't show, my like for other people doesn't show and nothing about me actually shows. Ever. My other blogs about weird characters in my head describe me better. And I can't pinpoint what small insignificant problem stops me from being me all the time. Blah blah blah generic complaining.

I'll just shut up now and do my best to be totally awesome for Stu's funday Monday.