the "personality type" thing
by, 01-19-2011 at 08:08 AM (325 Views)
i have noticed that while my friends are a "little" interested in the mbti thing, no one actually cares about it as much as i do.
my friend brought up a really good point yesterday while i was eavesdropping on him talking to my wife (not actually as rude as you would think within our relationship, we really have no secrets from eachother. while we are both kind of private we aren't with eachother): because i have no defined standard by which to judge people, nor myself, the mbti is a perfect way for me to sort people into categories because of my natural tendency to be analytical and concrete and precise.
i was naturally drawn to it because of myself, because of my lack of understanding "who i am" which is a common point in many of my posts, but i also really like it because to me it is very easy to type other people and i have successfully typed each one of my friends.
the only one who i got wrong was my "infp" friend, who i have redetermined is actually an enfp. i made my initial conclusion during a period in his life where he was experiencing depression, which gave me the idea he was introverted. he isn't. he doesn't surround himself by people but he enjoys talking to them and doesn't need to shut himself away, or "re-charge". he is constantly relaxed all the time because he tends to be fueled by the energy of those around him. the only difference is he is rather laid-back and not as hyper as many enfps i know. he does have a lot of infp traits though including the dreamy/contemplative quality.
anyway...obviously the mbti is flawed because there are factors that i take into account that may not be related to a person's type at all, but it is still a lot better foothold that i have on other people than i used to have. i used to have to judge people by individual behaviors each of them had and i would sort them in my head by every person distinctly. while this is more accurate it is also more painstaking and stressful. i like that i have a pre-set defined category i can put people into before building them up as individuals, it is a lot faster in my mind to do. i think as i grow more comfortable with other people and with myself i will probably rely less and less on mbti to help me figure other people out, but until then i think it is a good starting point.
i also have a sneaking suspicion that as i evolve and work toward changing my confidence issues and my people-pleasing issues i will likely change from being an isfj to an istj. not that any one is better than the other, but i am currently stuck in the entirely-negative expression of isfj, which includes a lot of traits that annoy other people. self-deprecating, apologetic, conformist, self-blaming, unworthiness, low confidence.
while i recognize these behaviors and i am trying to stop them and realize my own worth, i am also very much aware of how annoying it is to other people, which sucks because i want to make other people happy, which starts a vicious circle...