You despise many people. Alright, that wasn’t it. You already knew that didn’t you. One more thing—many people hate us as well. It doesn’t have to be like this. You are capable of charming the pants off anyone you meet, yet your introversion stifles you. Do me a favor—realize that: you are a good conversationalist, you are extremely smart, you’re a quick thinker, you can command attention, and you’re probably pretty good looking. The point is everybody has a cookie, and you are able to get it.
Here is a list of my difficulties: I ignore acquaintances as I pass by, I find it almost physically impossible to smile, I keep my words brief, I prefer not to talk to anyone, I wish people would leave me alone most of the time, I wish people would not tell me useless things, the list goes on…
Q: What must we do to have social comfort and interact well with people?
A: Suffer to say what you are thinking (consider your words carefully, so as not to come off as a prick)
Try to smile
Don’t be so quick to call people retarded (It’s a tough one, I know).
Here is a real life example. Every morning I patronized the coffee shop in the campus library, ordering a single espresso. Apparently nobody orders this particular drink at my college, so the hot barista lady asked me whether I want it in some steamed milk or an iced coffee. I had to think, It might not be nice to say, “No. That’s not what I asked for, you idiot.” Instead I said, “No thanks, just black.” Ever after, she knew my usual.
At the end of the school year, I was studying for a final in the library with a friend. We decided to get coffees. I ordered a fastidious cappuccino. The barista and I exchanged playful banter. Back at the books my friend remarked, “Man I wish I could charm women like that.”
I didn’t do it on purpose, I guess I’m oblivious too.
You may be INTJ, but you can get social benefits in addition to independence.
Leave me your comments, observations, and anything I missed.