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Type and Marriage: MBTI and Enneagram

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This is a discussion on Type and Marriage: MBTI and Enneagram within the Articles forums, part of the Announcements category; hmm, 4s, 6s, and 8s are my best matches? Well, definitely the 4 fits, my current partner is a 4 ...

  1. #21

    hmm, 4s, 6s, and 8s are my best matches? Well, definitely the 4 fits, my current partner is a 4 and we are definitely solid. The 6 and 8 though, hmm can't say I've ever been romantically attracted to either type. Interesting find nevertheless, thank you for sharing. ^^
    MBTI Enthusiast thanked this post.

  2. #22

    The issue I have with the Enneagram one, is when you look at the chart showing the overall distribution of types. There is no way in hell 17% of males are Eights and 20% of females are Twos. Those are very likely mistypes due to gender roles. It's a shame because it makes the entire results inaccurate.

  3. #23

    Would it strike you that a very type 1 intp and an estp would work together? A bit about said estp... he seems to be more mature and serious than other estp guys of my acquaintance, he's a volunteer fireman, he seems to take notice of people's feelings, and he's been interested in me for years, I do believe. I'm not sure on his Enneagram type.

    And, does anyone know what Enneagram type works best with a 1?

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  5. #24

    everyone ignore this comment
    soya thanked this post.

  6. #25

    cool thread by the way

  7. #26

    Ive been having lots of connections with intps type 5, is that doomed?
    I am a type 5 v6 INTP. With any INTP it will most likley be difficult emotional wise. I wouldn't think doomed.
    MBTI Enthusiast thanked this post.

  8. #27

    There are many things not taken into account, like type combinations. I understand the likelihood of certain trends. But first of all, on the list of 'likely people to get married' at the end, 5s weren't on it at all. Are they supposing 5s just stay single? Also, is this fair, if 5s supposedly make up a smaller percentage of the population? Also, if I'm an ENFP 584 does this still apply? I've always done really well in relationships with male 8s.
    MBTI Enthusiast and Daeva thanked this post.

  9. #28

    Quote Originally Posted by Cherubic Rogue View Post
    There are many things not taken into account, like type combinations. I understand the likelihood of certain trends. But first of all, on the list of 'likely people to get married' at the end, 5s weren't on it at all. Are they supposing 5s just stay single? Also, is this fair, if 5s supposedly make up a smaller percentage of the population? Also, if I'm an ENFP 584 does this still apply? I've always done really well in relationships with male 8s.
    So you're saying that on this list:

    7. The 6 most common type pairings are:

    18 pairs: male 8, female 2
    16 pairs: male 9, female 4
    15 pairs: male 6, female 2
    15 pairs: male 9, female 1
    14 pairs: male 5, female 1
    14 pairs: male 6, female 9
    Female 5s aren't represented?

    I think the only reason for that is that they were just looking at the raw numbers in that section. Female 5s have TWO standard deviations above chance of marrying Male 1s as the study showed, but since there are so few Female 5s, there were only 5 marriages tallied. I think the chart itself is more important, as the authors factored in the numbers of females and males of each type.

    As for doing well in relationships with Male 8s, that may well be true. But for whatever reason Female 5s don't seem to end up marrying them.
    Out0fAmmo and Animal thanked this post.

  10. #29

    Yeah that's the list. There are supposedly so few female 5s, but there are so many on the forum! A few people have theorized that it's because 5s are analytical and most likely to be drawn to such a forum.

    Anyhow.. if there were only 5 marriages tallied, and one was between a female 5 and male 8, then I guess it happened at least once :p They're just saying it's below standard deviation. I still don't think it applies to a Fe 5, though. I think a lot of 5s are lumped together as "thinking types" and "dry analytical types" and for people like that, the impulsive behavior of an 8 or the overbearing/loving nature of a 2 may be annoying; but I have a strong 4 wing and a Fe (I'm still not sure what I am but I have a strong Ni and Ne and Fe) .... and an 8 in my tritype.. so all I'm saying is, among each type there are many variations. I've been told I'm the only Fe-ish 5 on the forum?? Therefore I don't think this sort of thing would apply to me, and I also think other people might not fit in (for instance, I met a shy 2 on the forum today)..... but it is still pretty cool to see the statistics.


    Quote Originally Posted by MBTI Enthusiast View Post
    So you're saying that on this list:



    Female 5s aren't represented?

    I think the only reason for that is that they were just looking at the raw numbers in that section. Female 5s have TWO standard deviations above chance of marrying Male 1s as the study showed, but since there are so few Female 5s, there were only 5 marriages tallied. I think the chart itself is more important, as the authors factored in the numbers of females and males of each type.

    As for doing well in relationships with Male 8s, that may well be true. But for whatever reason Female 5s don't seem to end up marrying them.

  11. #30

    Quote Originally Posted by Cherubic Rogue View Post
    Yeah that's the list. There are supposedly so few female 5s, but there are so many on the forum! A few people have theorized that it's because 5s are analytical and most likely to be drawn to such a forum.
    Well, there are currently 42,284 members on the site. Assuming a 50/50 ratio of males and females, there are 21,142 females. And assuming that 4% of women are 5s as it says on the site, there should be around 1,057 Type 5 females on the site. Perhaps the female 5s are more drawn to remain active on the site because of their desire for knowledge, whereas other types may forget about it.

    Quote Originally Posted by Cherubic Rogue View Post
    Anyhow.. if there were only 5 marriages tallied, and one was between a female 5 and male 8, then I guess it happened at least once :p They're just saying it's below standard deviation.
    Well, for Female 5s there were 16 marriages tallied, actually. I was saying there were 5 between the Male 1 and Female 5. But yes, F5+M8 did happen once. I just tend to think there is some reason that there aren't more marriages between those two.

    Quote Originally Posted by Cherubic Rogue View Post
    I still don't think it applies to a Fe 5, though. I think a lot of 5s are lumped together as "thinking types" and "dry analytical types" and for people like that, the impulsive behavior of an 8 or the overbearing/loving nature of a 2 may be annoying; but I have a strong 4 wing and a Fe (I'm still not sure what I am but I have a strong Ni and Ne and Fe) .... and an 8 in my tritype.. so all I'm saying is, among each type there are many variations.
    Sure, that's why I think that you have to consider Enneagram as well as MBTI when considering a mate. It makes sense that you always view everything you read about enneagram through the lens of your specific MBTI type. Have you read the 5-8 compatibility post, and does that fit? I've always found those to be extremely accurate.

     
    Quote Originally Posted by Grey View Post
    • Type Five-Type Eight

    These two types bring to each other complementary and reciprocal talents—just what the other needs but is not necessarily aware of. For instance, Enneagram Fives need to be more identified with their body and with their instinctive energy; they need to be more engaged with the practical world and to feel their own sense of power and capacity. They can learn these qualities from Eights. On the other hand, Eights need to be more thoughtful and aware of the impact of their actions on themselves and on their environment. They need to know more and to think of consequences more carefully before acting. Every action produces a reaction, and it is not necessarily the one that the Eight wants to happen. This kind of analytic foresight is something Eights can learn from Fives.

    Besides these qualities, both Fives and Eights bring a common insistence on independence and non-interference from others. Both types are aware of boundaries and dislike intrusion. Both enjoy a good debate, and both admire someone who stands up for himself intellectually and/or physically. Both types feel like misfits and so they understand each other's emotional core, often in an unspoken way. Both types need personal space, but when they find each other, they can both show a surprising degree of need and vulnerability. They see the other person behind the defense, relating to each others' sense of dignity and hidden vulnerabilities. Both can be stoical toward their own suffering and unhappiness, with little or no self-pity. As a couple, they can bring power and depth, action and thoughtfulness, brilliance and brashness to their world. They are also the natural protectors and advisers of each other: Eights love to protect less tough Fives, and Fives help Eights recognize the subtleties for their plans and actions. These two types can therefore band together as a coalition of power and brains, a formidable combination.

    Potential Trouble Spots or Issues

    Fives are not much in touch with their physical bodies—they identify with their minds and are indifferent to virtually all of the physical and practical goals that more earthy Eights have. Not wanting a house, a company, or a spouse are all sources of pride to average Fives who feel good about themselves when they can cut off from their needs and learn to do without. Eights, by contrast, take pride in their earthly conquests, whether socially, financially, sexually, or psychologically. Making their mark on their environment is a primary goal for Eights and they often use their physical stature and energy to intimidate people and enforce their will. Thus, the more insecure these two types become, the more they react in completely opposite ways: Fives shut down more completely, become more taciturn, secretive, and isolated, while Eights become more confrontational, threatening, and enraged.
    The biggest problem is that in the lower Levels, these two separate physically from the other and any real communication ceases to take place. Lower functioning Fives tend to lose respect for anyone they judge to be irrational, destructive, and out of control. The storminess and threats of unhealthy Eights terrify Fives who must physically leave to feel safe. They know and will attack each other's vulnerabilities if sufficiently provoked—and both Fives and Eights tend to provoke each other as a way of protecting themselves. Both types are also sensitive to rejection and both tend to feel rejected easily. The Five's departure will trigger a strong rejection reaction in the Eight who will likely retaliate in any way that he or she can. An Eight's departure will trigger the Five's rejection feelings, but more likely with a collapse into cynicism and depression. Both can be extremely cynical, and the demise of their relationship only confirms their darkest opinions about the possibility of human beings living together.

    [Source]


    Quote Originally Posted by Cherubic Rogue View Post
    I've been told I'm the only Fe-ish 5 on the forum?? Therefore I don't think this sort of thing would apply to me, and I also think other people might not fit in (for instance, I met a shy 2 on the forum today)..... but it is still pretty cool to see the statistics.
    So wait... your profile says you are ENFP but you have a lot of Fe? ENFPs have Ne + Fi. If you have a lot of Fe, I'd look at ENFJ or INFJ. I'd be skeptical of an ENFP or ENFJ 5, though. INFJ 5 is slightly more likely. I'm a more rare combination as well, ISTJ + 9, but these articles have fit me perfectly. Just because you are "rare" doesn't mean they won't fit.

    Are 2s not supposed to be shy? I've never heard that stereotype...
    Out0fAmmo and Animal thanked this post.


     
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