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This is a discussion on Career Quandary within the Advice Center forums, part of the The Cafe Lounge category; What do you all think about quitting a job because it doesn't match up with your personality? I had to ...

  1. #1

    Career Quandary

    What do you all think about quitting a job because it doesn't match up with your personality?

    I had to ask someone's opinion because I'm the kind of person that can literally talk myself into or out of anything with a solid argument for both sides. Makes it impossible to make decisions. Here are the issues I have with my current position of 10 months:

    1. I hate giving presentations and hosting workshops (which are 50% of my job duties... I enjoy the other 50%).

    2. I don't like primarily working from home because:
    a. I need an enforced structure to work under (too much freedom & free time)
    b. I enjoy having competent co-workers to collaborate or socialize with when needed

    3. I hate driving to multiple locations for work.

    4. I hate that my job responsibilities change constantly week-to-week (no set schedule)

    5. I hate that I have no set hours.

    Not only do I want something constant and structured, but I want something where I'm not avoiding 50% of my responsibilities due to social anxiety or just my introverted nature. The hard part is that my job is certainly giving me good experience in the field I want to work in, but I don't know if it's worth me being anxious, unmotivated, idle/lonely, stressed, and annoyed for another year of service (there's a 1-2 year service commitment). I would enjoy and be qualified for a job in office support but that would lead me out of the field I want to work in. What would you do?
    RocketSurgeon thanked this post.



  2. #2

    I'm also very introverted, and my work requires quite a bit of extroversion: leading/directing, presenting, answering to superiors, and generally being a public, "in-charge" figure. It can be pretty terrifying, even when things are going perfectly well. I've learned to love it and thrive in it, though, despite many blunders and mistakes along the way.

    But it sounds like your issue is mainly a lack of structure, not introversion in an extroverted environment. One answer is that you need to create your own structure. Self-motivation is the most critical career skill in life, and no school or college can teach it. The key is to realize that the little decisions you make, moment by moment (wake up or sleep in, work out or eat ice cream, get angry at the bad or be thankful for the good), ultimately determine who you are and who you'll be for the rest of your life. With every little action you take, you need to subconsciously ask yourself if it will lead you closer to or further from your goals.

    For your question, I would honestly recommend gutting it out. It sounds like you're in a good situation, or at least the situation you're in could give you better long-term results than making a short-sighted job switch. Whatever the case, you must make your decision with the long-term future in mind. Will switching jobs now get you closer to where you want to be in five years? Ten years? Twenty years? Then do it. Otherwise, you may be better off sticking with the hardship for now with the expectation of a better situation in the not-so-distant future.

  3. #3

    I think I'm a lot like you in terms of decisions - easy to talk myself in our out of anything, easy to see both sides! :)

    Overall, I agree with @RocketSurgeon that looking at your situation in the long term is the right course of action. I've been through a fair number of jobs over the last 12 years including several that don't match up with my personality, and what I've found is that sometimes it's better to move on and sometimes it's better to hang on - it just depends on what's most important to you, and sometimes it's a leap of faith in either direction. A job not matching up with your personality is not necessarily a problem in and of itself - it may be an uphill climb at times, but it can also lend itself to creating a niche where you are particularly valuable because you have an additional set of strengths on top of the skillset you've developed in your role.

    Regarding your current job, I understand what you mean about the structure, and have been pretty miserable in the few freelance gigs I've taken on. Even as a P, I too prefer a set schedule and a physical, social workplace. I'm actually in a situation kind of similar to you currently - my job doesn't match up with my personality, and I know I can't do this forever. There are some aspects I love but others that I'm frustrated with and avoid - though realistically that will exist in any position, of course. Because it's a good place to be in the big picture, I don't have any current intentions of looking for other jobs, even though part of me is already itching to move on. I try to look at the positives and celebrate little happinesses during the day. I try to embrace opportunities I have to learn things that will help me in the long term, and sometimes I take a little break to work on my long-term life projects when I'm feeling frustrated and overwhelmed. And I also think back on all the great unexpected things I've gained as a result of jobs I've not loved - opportunities to travel, people I've met, new skills I've learned, new environments I've been introduced to. Even if a day is not enjoyable, it's not wasted if you use it to become a stronger, wiser, more resilient person.

    When you "zoom out", it really is a good situation to be where you are - not just because you're on a long-term track, but also because you are in a position of power. It doesn't sound like you're in imminent danger of losing your job because you aren't competent at it, just that you're very dissatisfied with it, and you've said you're already qualified for another common position. Your hand isn't being forced. You can always leave if you decide it's just gotten to be more miserable than it's worth. For now if I were you I'd just take my time to do some research. Will your current frustrations be resolved once you're finished with this service commitment, or do you need to reconsider your field at large? If not, is there any other way you could get into that field besides your current position? Any back doors? An internship? Maybe you could also see if you could pick up a night of volunteering in a position that's more engaging for you. Sometimes even just a little something to look forward to each week can help.
    littlebubblebub thanked this post.

  4. #4

    Quote Originally Posted by littlebubblebub View Post
    What do you all think about quitting a job because it doesn't match up with your personality?

    I had to ask someone's opinion because I'm the kind of person that can literally talk myself into or out of anything with a solid argument for both sides. Makes it impossible to make decisions. Here are the issues I have with my current position of 10 months:

    1. I hate giving presentations and hosting workshops (which are 50% of my job duties... I enjoy the other 50%).

    2. I don't like primarily working from home because:
    a. I need an enforced structure to work under (too much freedom & free time)
    b. I enjoy having competent co-workers to collaborate or socialize with when needed

    3. I hate driving to multiple locations for work.

    4. I hate that my job responsibilities change constantly week-to-week (no set schedule)

    5. I hate that I have no set hours.

    Not only do I want something constant and structured, but I want something where I'm not avoiding 50% of my responsibilities due to social anxiety or just my introverted nature. The hard part is that my job is certainly giving me good experience in the field I want to work in, but I don't know if it's worth me being anxious, unmotivated, idle/lonely, stressed, and annoyed for another year of service (there's a 1-2 year service commitment). I would enjoy and be qualified for a job in office support but that would lead me out of the field I want to work in. What would you do?
    i don't know, if you like 50% i'd say take the 50% that you don't like and think of it as a challenge to your growth. they say whenever you dislike something, it has something to teach you about yourself. you say it's your introverted nature. i'd think that would be something to overcome. like i used to be really shy but then i became a hairdresser and was forced to socialize all day until i came to be much more extroverted. i'm sorry you dislike those aspects of your job, but think of all the people you will be helping. i think 80% of a task is in your attitude towards it. you say the job gives you good experience in your field. i'd tough it out and use it as a stepping stone. why trade a decent thing for uncertainty?

    so i consulted the online tarot. should she quit her job? was the question. the card i got implies there might be the beginnings of some emotional concerns? if the things you wrote about, no set schedule, working from home, etc. are really taking a toll on you like that, maybe it would be a good idea to look for a new job. (sorry i was thinking those were things you didn't want in a new job, not what you were dealing with already..) or maybe just stay in it long enough to propel yourself to a better job in the same field.
    littlebubblebub thanked this post.


     

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